September 3, 2024, will mark 40 years since Iron Maiden released their seminal Powerslave album. Doubtlessly, the anniversary will bring with it discussions of multiple Maiden classics, from the all-guns-blazing excitement of Aces High to the poetic grandeur of 13-minute odyssey Rime Of The Ancient Mariner. However, one brilliant track of the era that won’t get quite as much attention (despite deserving it) is Mission From ’Arry: the 2 Minutes To Midnight b-side that remains one of the funniest things in heavy metal history.
Mission From ’Arry is not a song. Instead, it’s an expletive-laden argument between bassist Steve “’Arry” Harris and drummer Nicko McBrain, with frontman Bruce Dickinson occasionally piping up to stir the pot. The seven-minute recording documents the most cockney argument ever committed to tape, an incensed Nicko spewing one-liners as ridiculous as “Fuck my old boots!” and “He made me fuck!” The fury and confusion reach their glorious punchline when Steve grabs the tape recorder and, before shutting it off, declares, “Some cunt’s recording this.” It’s an unquestionable masterpiece of schadenfreude.
