Ever heard of the term “amaxophobia”? Well, it means fear of driving, and it really gives anxiety to some people who are asked to drive. I am so glad I don’t have it, because I honestly can’t imagine my life without roaming around in my beloved vehicle.
The original poster’s partner, however, has never explained why he simply refused to learn how to drive and would snap whenever she asked him the reason. This did not stop him from demanding that she chauffeur the kids to his mom’s house; of course, this upset her!
More info: Mumsnet
Some people just don’t like driving but absolutely refusing to even learn how to, without giving any reason, sounds unfair
The poster’s partner never learned how to drive even after she gifted him driving classes, and he never told her the reason why but snapped whenever she asked him
Image credits: Viewsaremyown
Even when they had kids, the poster went to the hospital in a taxi and her parents picked her up, while they asked friends for lifts during the lockdown
Image credits: Viewsaremyown
Now, the poster has been doing all the driving while dropping their kids at her parents’ house and her partner feels that it’s unfair for his mom and demanded she drive them there as well
Image credits: Viewsaremyown
Along with managing her job and kids, she is highly annoyed by his demands and feels sick of having to drive everywhere
Today, we dive into a very strange story where the poster’s partner of 20 years has always simply refused to give a reason why he never learned how to drive. He had even added it to his to-do list, so she gifted him driving lessons, and not just her; OP mentions that even her family had given him similar gifts. However, it was all wasted money as he was just adamant about never learning.
Many times, the poster tried to reason with him and gently asked him why, to which the man always snapped and, to quote the poster, “bit her head off”. Ouch, anger issues much? Another strange thing was that he kept mentioning that he would learn, even before they were to have their first child, but just never acted on his word.
When they had both their kids, the poster went to the hospital in a taxi, which she found very uncomfortable, while her parents came to pick them up, which she felt was very immature. To be honest, who’s to blame her; with all the issues that arise after delivery, it must be annoying for her. Even during the lockdown, they had to rely on their friends to drive them around.
Coming to the present, her parents—who live 1.5 hours away—looked after their kids for a week. To be fair to his mom, OP’s partner demanded that she drive the children to her house, which is 2 hours away, and it was simply too much for her.
The poster was just exhausted from juggling her full-time job and the kids, so driving to his mom, which would create more drama, was quite a stretch for her. In the comments, she admitted that she handles more burden compared to him, but he justified it by stating that he needs to travel for work.
When she posted her frustrating situation online, people found her partner to be quite strange and entitled. They found it absurd that he never told her the reason why he refused to learn because, after all, they’ve been together for 20 years and people felt that she has a right to know.
Netizens commented that it’s unfair of him to demand so much from her because it must be physically draining if she’s been managing everything along with chauffeuring the kids. People said that he should use public transport if he wants to be “fair to his mum”.
As per Statista, 68% of the British population drive their car to work, with 11% using rail services. If so many people can use public transport for commuting, then he should also have no problem in doing so rather than burdening OP.
Another important aspect that netizens highlighted was how aggressively he reacted when she asked him the reason for his refusal, and his anger issues were alarming.
Choosing Therapy states, “Due to traditional gender norms, men may be more prone to types of anger that discourage emotional expression, leading them to suppress feelings until they boil over. Additionally, societal pressures to appear dominant and in control can exacerbate anger problems.”
The poster also mentioned that he has always avoided having difficult conversations—just like his mom—and people replied that he might be suppressing them, which isn’t healthy. Folks also added that he needs to resolve his anger issues as it might rub off on their children. Some advised the woman to leave him, and she replied that she was considering it.
What would you do in her shoes? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below!
Folks online found it really strange that he refused to even discuss it with her and they said that he should use public transport to take the kids to his mom and not make her drive
