As this piece is written the creator is munching down on a hashbrown butty with a cheeky cheese slice to recover from a boozy Christmas curry. This is by no means a criticism of anyone's fitness or weight. Let thee who is without sin and all that.
But Kalvin Phillips has still caught Pep Guardiola's ire this week as the Manchester City boss revealed he wasn't involved in the Carabao Cup clash with Liverpool due to the condition he returned from the World Cup in. "He's not injured. He arrived overweight. I don't know [why]. He didn't arrive in the condition to do training sessions and to play," he said.
Guardiola has called out players in the past for not being at the peak of their powers physically, just like Riyad Mahrez in October, but none have come in for such a harsh public haranguing as Phillips has. Being 'overweight' for a footballer isn't like being overweight to you and me. The standards are so incredibly high and any of us would kill to be in the 'overweight' shape Phillips is in. It would hardly be surprising if he's only a kilogram or two over which will be burned off in no time.
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Yet, it still isn't the best look for Phillips as he hits yet another speed bump in the inauspicious start to his City career. The battling midfielder has only played 54 minutes for the club this season due to various injuries. He can't be blamed for needing shoulder surgery, an injury that was caused during a mid-season friendly, but it has still left City in a tough position with only one natural holding midfielder available.
Guardiola voiced his frustration with the situation as early as September: "Absolutely [it's been frustrating] – for us as well. We need him because Rodri cannot play all the games, Kalvin came to fight for that position and sometimes you need two holding midfielders to be more defensive," he said.
"But I think it will be a bit longer because I think he needs it [surgery]. Every time he’s out because of this and the doctors say if it’s three or four times out then the only solution is to have surgery."
It's hard to blame a man for taking as many holiday days as he can but when Phillips already knows he is second choice and has hardly played this season due to fitness issues... Surely he should have returned a bit earlier after England's exit? Perhaps the defeat hit him hard and he needed time to process it but physical fatigue shouldn't have been an issue as he only played 40 minutes.
It's not being overweight itself which is the real issue, it's that he could have reported back for training earlier, burned it off and been involved against Liverpool - a game which was a great chance for him to get his first start. It usually takes new signings a year or so to get used to Guardiola's methods even when they're playing every week, so Phillips is now so far behind.
Hopefully, Phillips can turn things around because, as Guardiola says, City need him but so far all he has done is give City another reason to sign Jude Bellingham in the summer. After sorting out defence and attack for the foreseeable, midfield is the next position in need of rejuvenating.
Ilkay Gundogan is 32 and out of contract in the summer with an extension not guaranteed, Kevin De Bruyne will be 32 by the time next season begins and Bernardo Silva has been looking to return to mainland Europe for the last two summers. That leaves only Rodri and Phillips as midfielders in their 20s whose futures are in little doubt.
A new signing was already needed to bring in fresh blood and Phillips' unreliableness has made one even more crucial. No midfielder makes more sense to sign than Bellingham, even more so after proving he can perform on the biggest stage and under the highest pressure. Just like Erling Haaland was the most nailed-on signing last year, there is a similar feeling with his former Borussia Dortmund teammate.
Not only can City offer Bellingham a reunion with Haaland, but the allure of working with Pep Guardiola is a massive pull as well as playing in the best club in the country with a near guarantee of winning trophies alongside a lot of England teammates.
City already had all the reasons they needed to sign Bellingham but Phillips has given them yet another.
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