Much like the mysterious DB Cooper – if he were Scottish, famous, and a woman – Lorraine Kelly has disappeared. That’s the gripe, at least, among some fans of Lorraine, Kelly’s popular ITV morning show. In recent years, the presenter has been taking more and more time off from her regular hosting duties; a X/Twitter account called “Where is Lorraine?” (@LorraineKWatch) even devoted itself to documenting her absences. “It’s really hurtful, actually,” Kelly said, in an interview with The Guardian last week. “Maybe it started off as a wee joke, but it’s the way that everyone piles on. I find it really sad.”
In the grand scheme of online celebrity-shaming, the Lorraine absenteeism watchdog was really rather benign. Compare it to, for instance, the Twitter page dedicated to tracking Taylor Swift’s prolific private jet usage: it’s easy to imagine why Swift threatened legal action against an account that laid bare her T Rex-size carbon footprint. But charting Kelly’s holidays? It’s hardly a scandalous criticism, nor an inaccurate one. (Kelly featured as the host for 154 out of 258 total Lorraine episodes last year – less than 60 per cent.)
