Liam Payne's sister is struggling to accept that he is gone.
The former One Direction star died at the age of 31 last Wednesday (16.10.24) after falling from a balcony in Buenos Aires and now Ruth Gibbins, 33, has admitted that she "doesn't believe" any of it is happening and as she looked back on his rise to fame, noted that she found the motivation to pass her driving test so she could always be there for him whenever he needed her.
She wrote on Instagram: "I don't believe this is happening. Many times have I poured my heart out publicly with pride about Liam but never much about life as his sister.
Liam is my best friend, no one could ever make me laugh as much as him, doing his impressions always had me creasing and he loved seeing how much of a laugh he could get.
"He moved out when he was 17 to chase his dreams, its this that forced me to finally pass my driving test during the xfactor live show weeks because I couldn't stand the thought of not being able to get to him. I would regularly drive to have tea with him after I finished work, just to sit around. One month the hotel was right by a wagamamas and I swear he had it morning, noon and night!
"I used to love picking him up from work when it all started, especially after concerts, speeding us away from venues or appearances, Liam plugging in his phone to show me the new songs for albums. Liam loved 1D, he loved his brothers and we talked about it so much. He would just play song after song that had been recorded but never used and we'd sit having a mini 1D concert."
"Liam knew he could call me anytime, any day and I would pick up or that I would always fetch him if he needed to just come home. Our calls would often result in me laughing at his ideas and next adventure, talking through his plans and working through his issues but it would always end with 'love you miss you' 'love you ru.'"
Liam found fame alongside Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles, Niall Horan and Zayn Malik as part of the world's first billion-dollar boyband before going on to a solo career with hit single 'Strip That Down' and Ruth always knew that her brother could be a star.
She said: "Liam was born with music in his veins, it was clear from a very young age he just had that quality that would make him a star. I could sit and listen to him sing all day, which is a good job really because he never bloody stopped! I will never tire of the look he gives when showing new songs, 'listen loud' he'd say and just grin with pride of his work.
"I keep notes on my phone 'things to tell liam' so that if he was away working for a while, I'd know what I needed to update him on. I suppose it's only right I tell him now."(sic)
In a second statement, Ruth admitted that her "brain is struggling to catch up" with the events that have unfolded over the last few days and she "doesn't understand" where her brother has gone as she spoke directly to him in the form of a letter.
She wrote: "Liam, My brain is struggling to catch up with what's happening and I don't understand where you've gone.
I just want to drive to your house and walk in to music blasting and find you sat there writing a song or walk in to your art phases and sit with you whilst you draw or craft.
"What I love most about you is your ability to make me laugh, I never chuckle as much as I do when I'm with you with anyone else.
I'm always in awe of your talent, it should be illegal to be so talented and just have the ability to not only be good at things but be bloody great at everything you attempt, without even knowing you're absolutely smashing it each time.
"I love your kindness and how proud I am to call you my brother and my best friend. You also make a great Sunday dinner too!"
Ruth has become the first member of Liam's immediate family to speak out following the tragedy, although in the immediate aftermath, an unnamed relative claimed that Ruth, his other sister Nicola and their parents Karen and Geoff had been left "devastated" by what had happened.
Ruth continued her statement by claiming that she doesn't feel as if the "world was good enough or kind enough" to her brother - who leaves behind son Bear, seven. from his previous relationship with Girls Aloud star Cheryl - and is "sorry" that she couldn't save him but vowed to take care of her nephew.
"I don't feel this world was good enough or kind enough to you, and quite often over the last few years, you've had to really try hard to overcome all that was being aimed at you. You just wanted to be loved and to make people happy with your music. You never believed you were good enough, I hope you can now see this outpouring of love that you never received in your time.
"Thank you for changing my life, thank you for the incredible memories, thank you for being the best brother and friend I'll ever have! We'll take care of Bear and he will always know how incredible his Dad is and how much you idolise him.
"I'm sorry I couldn't save you.
"Love you, oh how my heart misses you,
Ru xxx
"One last time I need you to know, I'm here if you need anything, I'd drive to the end of the universe to bring you back."(sic)
