Kim Kardashian is ready to squeeze your face

‘The Kardashians and other celebrities don’t look the way that they do because they strap medieval-looking torture devices around their faces.’ Photograph: Aurélien Morissard/AP

The Kardashians want to monetize your chin

If you’ve got $48 and a burning desire to look like you’ve just had major jaw surgery, then you’re in luck! Kim Kardashian’s shapewear brand Skims has just come out with a contraption called the Seamless Sculpt Face Wrap, which it describes as its “first-ever face innovation”. It’s essentially a piece of Velcro that goes around your face to provide what the marketing copy describes as “targeted compression for shaping & sculpting” via “collagen yarn”. No, I don’t know what that means either.