Kerry Katona has branded her marriage to Westlife star Brian McFadden "fake" - almost two decades after they divorced.
The former golden couple of showbiz were the talk of the town once the Atomic Kitten singer started dating the Westlife heartthrob but despite marrying in 2002, they divorced two years later.
Kerry, 42, and Brian, 43, share two daughters, Molly Marie and Lilly-Sue but she admits they have no contact now as their daughters are grown up.
The Whole Again singer also explained that their two daughters often phone her fiancé Ryan Mahoney before they will phone their dad, Brian.
Speaking exclusively to the Mirror, she said: "Obviously first marriage I thought it would last forever, I just went along with it.
"It was just fake, it wasn't real, it wasn't meant to be - it wasn't what I wanted, it was all fake and phoney."
The Warrington-born star said that growing up, she was "desperate to be loved" and "so desperate to please" but admits she went about it "the wrong way".
On her relationship with Brian, she stated: "Not seen him [since Molly's 21st birthday] because the girls are grown up now, we've got no reason to talk.
"Not that we really talked, we never really had that kind of close relationship, they'll ring Ryan before they ring Brian. If they need money, they ring Ryan.
"That's just how it is, he's got his own little family now, Ryan pays for Molly's car insurance. Molly and Ryan have such a great relationship, it's funny when they're together."
Despite Ryan having a great relationship with Kerry's children, the couple have discussed having a child of their own although they are not planning to have one any time soon.
Now in a happy relationship, Kerry says that she no longer relies on men for happiness as chilled-out Ryan "enhances" her own happiness now.
"For so long, I had daddy issues, men issues, I was trying to create this dream that I had as a kid but with the wrong person, until I found the right person," she said before adding: "The other day, we were laying on the bed and Ryan comes up and the three children come in.
"DJ is doing cartwheels, Max is toy fighting with Ryan and our Heidi is telling me about all the gossip about school and I just sat there looking and thinking 'Wow, I've got it, I've finally got what I wanted', I went to Ryan 'How lucky are we?'
"As far as I'm concerned, Ryan has been an amazing dad, I couldn't ask for more, it's been tough but I forget how lucky I am, it's so important to remind yourself that I've got through it."
The television personality went on to add: "I've got that family lifestyle, I feel so blessed that I've got what I always wanted and Ryan's been a massive part of that."
This week, Kerry launches the paperback copy of her memoir, Whole Again: Love, Life And Me documenting her struggles as a young girl to her turbulent past and finding herself back on top of the showbiz circuit.
She said: "I've had so many DMs and emails since releasing the book and it's summer now, it's easier to take a softback cover.
"For me, it's re-enlightening the fact that the book is out there and it's a ridiculous response that I've actually had to the book that I know there's more people that can go and get it and it'll help.
"I've just been doing the audiobook as well, so that will be out soon. I'm probably the most straightforward and honest celebrity you'll ever meet, I'm an open book.
"There's things in there that I really struggled writing because it was so difficult to write."
"People say to me, 'Kerry who helped you get through all of that?'", she said before adding: "There's nobody on my level of honesty when someone's going through, that they can look up to and get advice or inspiration.
"I like to think I'm that person, I've had to be my own hero, I've had to be my own inspiration because nobody helped me.
"Obviously I've had people around and stuff but it comes from you, that's the soul of this book – it's about learning about you as a person."
Kerry Katona: Whole Again, published by Mirror Books RRP £9.99, is on sale in paperback from 6th July. You can pre-order from Amazon now.
