After her husband posted a social media message celebrating Donald Trump's election, a liberal voter expressed deep feelings of betrayal and isolation, ultimately leading her to cancel holiday plans with his family.
"God Bless America. God bless #45, 47," read her husband's Facebook post. Tensions escalated when she texted her husband asking him to take it down.
"I love you, but out of respect for me and all my liberal writer friends, can you please take down that post?" she texted, later telling him she would be opting out of Thanksgiving and Christmas plans with his family.
In response, her husband apologized and brought her coffee in bed, but she remained skeptical of his understanding.
"Did he really understand what he and so many others in this country had done?" writer Andrea Tate wrote in a personal essay for Huffpost. "I could not forgive him. Not right now."
She struggled to reconcile her feelings with his vote, which she felt endangered the rights of marginalized communities and women, especially concerning reproductive health and LGBTQ rights.
In the days following the election, she coped by reaching out to her network for comfort. "I wrote to my artist friends and told them to keep shining their lights," she said. She also reassured her young nieces, musician son, and gay cousin to persist in hope.
Reflecting on her marriage, she noted how hard it was to navigate the divide. "I wanted to touch his forearms and feel our connection, but I also felt an urge to punish him and deny him my touch," she shared.
Her husband didn't argue with her decision to cancel holiday plans with his family, with whom she refused to give thanks and exchange gifts after they "voted for a party that wants to take rights away" from vulnerable communities. But he didn't take his post down either.
"I saw that you didn't take your post down, and that breaks my heart," she told him, resolved to maintain her composure. Going forward, she remains "devastated but determined," committed to her ideals and the fight for equality as she faces a season marked by discord in her marriage.
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