Jeremy Hunt delivers his first full Budget next week. Could it be his last?
Diehard supporters of blackguard Boris, who never forgave him for ousting their hero, would dearly love to get rid of the Chancellor.
That’s why he must be an optimist, not a Jeremiah, bringing good news for millions hard-pressed by the Tory cost of living crisis.
It’s not his style. He’s more the thin-lipped, long-faced bank manager scolding you for feckless spending.
But needs must.
Treasury-inspired leaks signal he will halt the cliff-edge calamity of rising energy prices – as I suggested here last week – and extend the freeze on fuel duty.
These measures will win him applause from Tory MPs desperate about their future, but they’re not enough to appease public opinion. Soaring food prices and rising mortgages – likely to increase yet again with another hike in the Bank interest rate later this month – are outside his power.
So the scene is set for a Westminster drama that begins as cheerful panto but then swiftly comes to an unhappy ending.
All Conservative Budgets are welcomed by their MPs and the Tory press, until pesky Paul Johnson of the independent Institute for Fiscal Studies reads the small print. Then they come off the rails, rather like HS2 did today. There’s no money for the northern leg to Crewe and Manchester, or the link into central London. The £70billion rail project looks like it will end up going from nowhere to nowhere, which is a perfect metaphor for this Government.
And for poor old Jeremiah with his little red box in particular.
Gary's still scoring
The Tories have a problem. They don’t like it up ’em – and that’s what Gary Lineker gives ’em. And so he should do, too.
What’s more, so should other famous people held in high public regard, like footballer Marcus Rashford and singer Rod Stewart.
Football pundit Gary stood firm as Conservative MPs bayed for his blood for criticising their gruesome migrant policy. Good on him. We need more independent voices like his willing to take on the Tories and their tame newspapers.
They are the true expression of decent Brits, not the likes of oafish 30p Lee Anderson MP.
Let’s call out the hypocrisy of politicians and broadcasting chiefs who slag off Gary for being “partial”, while up to their necks in bias themselves.
Harry the drugs dope
To the baffling question, “What on earth is Prince Harry on?” at last we have an answer.
He confessed on live TV (where else?) to taking a cocktail of cocaine, marijuana, alcohol and hallucinogenic ayahuasca. This psychedelic concoction “cleaned his windscreen and removed life’s filters” allowing him to relax and deal with old trauma.
Jolly good, but don’t try it at home. Medics warn ayahuasca, made from the bark of an Amazonian vine, is not recommended for either therapeutic or recreational use.
Harry doesn’t mention being love-drunk, but to my mind that’s his real addiction.
Sir Charles Bronson?
Britain’s most violent prisoner Charles Bronson tells his parole board hearing: “I’ve had more porridge than Goldilocks and the Three Bears. I’m into oil painting now.”
How long before Boris Johnson gives him a knighthood in his Resignation Honours list, for services to humour?
