Home is …
Notting Hill. I live there with my fiancée, Roxy, and our daughter, Elsie.
Where was your first flat in London?
My parents lived in Putney and I remember angling for a move to north or east London — I wanted to get as far away from them as possible. But then, miraculously, my mum managed to find a flat on the market that was within walking distance of their house. In fact, it had a sight line to their house. From her balcony, if you had binoculars — which I’m sure she did — you could literally see into the flat that I was in.
What was your first job?
I worked in a pub in Putney called the Spencer Arms. I’d started doing stand-up by that point, so I remember trying out material on the patrons of the pub and trying to weave new routines into taking orders. A lot of them fell quite flat because people just wanted to get served. I wasn’t a particularly good employee. That was my first — and I would say only — job.
Where would you recommend for a first date?
A comedy club — somewhere where you outsource the entertainment. Then you can get a sense of whether you have a similar sense of humour. That’s quite important for a relationship.
Which shops do you rely on?
I get everything on Zapp now. Does that count? I should be supporting small businesses…
Do you have anywhere you go for beauty procedures?
Whenever I have to be on camera and need a little bit of TLC, I go to FaceGym. I went yesterday because I’d been on my stag do over the weekend, then my daughter had kept me up all night kicking me in the face and I looked like I’d been dug up. They sort of slap your face a bit, and then scrape it with various tools. It doesn’t sound very appealing, but it’s very effective.
Where do you go to have fun and to let your hair down?
I do like the Devonshire, they’ve got a great room in the back as well with a piano, and I’ve had a couple of fun nights there. I went to The Box on my stag do, which I’m beginning to feel a little bit too old for. My friends had arranged a roast. Not a roast dinner, but a roast where they all got up and insulted me … a couple of them probably won’t be invited to the wedding now.
Who do you call when you want to have fun?
I’ve got a mate called Pete Brown who has a bar in east London called the Forest Road Taproom — that’s a great spot to hang out.
What’s the best meal you’ve had in London?
I had a great meal at the Fat Badger. They do a very good Sunday lunch.
What would you do if you were Mayor for the day?
I would delegate to other people who are more intelligent than me, then take credit for their ideas. Who’s my smartest friend? Richard Osman. Though he’s not really my friend. I mean, I like Richard Osman but we don’t hang out.
What’s the best thing a cabbie has ever said to you?
“How’s your Dad?”
Who is the most iconic Londoner?
I’m not allowed to say. I’ve been banned.
Where do you exercise?
I like running, but someone sent me some videos of me running in the wild and it was so awful to watch myself back that I had to buy a running machine. Now I have to do it in my basement with all of the windows shut and the curtains drawn so no one can see me.
Have you ever had a run-in with a police officer?
Once during Notting Hill Carnival I had a couple of mates over to my house. At one point I let someone in to use the toilet and forgot to shut the door, then within 15 minutes of doing that there were about 200 people in my flat. It was complete chaos, just random people. My house turned into a carnival party. I remember that being quite overwhelming. I remember thinking the police might come help, but I think they were part of the party as well.
What’s your London secret?
I like going to the Courtauld. And the Top Secret Comedy Club.
What’s your favourite work of art?
The paintings that hang on the railings outside Hyde Park.
As told to Claudia Cockerell. Jack Whitehall stars in The Burbs, available to watch on Sky and NOW
