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The Guardian - AU
The Guardian - AU
Lifestyle
Eleanor Gordon-Smith

I’m in my late 60s and in a situationship with a man I really like. I want more but I’m scared of losing him

Elegant Company by Gillis van Tilborgh
‘The more you can present your desire as information, and not a demand … the less you risk by saying it’, writes Eleanor Gordon-Smith. Painting: Elegant Company by Gillis van Tilborgh, 1655. Illustration: Wikimedia Commons

I’m in my late 60s, divorced three years ago. I’m now in a relationship with a man I really like and would love to see it continue to develop, however it feels more like a “situationship”.

It’s been three months so far, the attraction was instant and strong and felt very promising. We see each other on weekends, which he has stated works for him (partly because he lives an hour away). I’ve told him that I would like to spend more time together and, because of his response, I decided I’d ease off and see what happens. I know he likes me, we get on well and I also know he’s not seeing anyone else. The contact we have in between is sporadic and it’s usually me that initiates it. If he does, it’s very casual. Bottom line – I feel like I’m getting crumbs.

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