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The summer of 2005 was long and hot. Blair had just been voted in for a third term, Brangelina was conceived, and boys with guitars were all over the airwaves. I’m told by my mum that I spent a lot of it jumping into the sea and being dragged on ludicrously long bike rides with my dad. Not that I remember any of this, of course. No, the only thing I can recall from that time is one fateful night at my friend’s house, where I sat trembling behind a giant, tasselled cushion for the best part of two hours. The source of my terror? The critically eviscerated Robert De Niro horror film Hide and Seek, which had just been released on DVD.
