Singer Will Young has shared his guilt at being "unable to save" his brother, Rupert, who took his own life after a battle with alcoholism. In Channel 4 documentary, Will Young: Losing My Twin Rupert, the 43-year-old opens up about how Rupert's death has impacted him. In emotional scenes, Will says that he initially kept his grief hidden.
He goes on to talk about how his guilt stems from the fact that he was not able to help his brother and "threw him out" during a period of alcohol and substance abuse. "You’ve got this monster who’s not moving and who you’re feeding. It wasn’t sustainable so in the end, I threw him out," says Will as he talks openly about the period leading up to Rupert's death. He adds: "I was okay with everything I had done but I knew there was nothing else that I could do. I hadn’t gotten to that stage before but I’d [then] reached that stage.”
Rupert Young was 41 when he died after falling from a bridge in London on August 2, 2020. His death came a few days after paramedics saw him walking along the edge of the same bridge and he was admitted to hospital. Rupert had been living with Will for four years and the singer said that towards the end of his brother’s life he became his carer. Rupert, according to Will, had been battling alcohol abuse for over 20 years.
Will had been incredibly close to his twin brother. The singer recalls a time when, during one of his Pop Idol appearances, Rupert had attended after he had tried to cut his wrists. He describes how Rupert came to the studio and his stitches had come undone. Despite bleeding, Will's mother says that he wouldn’t leave the studio until he had watched his brother perform. "It was one of the most horrific things I’ve ever seen. I immediately vomited," said the brothers' father.
In the new film, Will describes how he found out that Rupert had died. “It was Sunday and there was a knock at the door and there were two police officers standing by the door. I said, 'he’s killed himself hasn’t he?'” The officers then asked to come in but Will asked them to tell him what had happened at the door. "I was very grateful when one of the officers told me straight," says Will as he relived the tragic moment from 2020.
Will's relationship with grief is complex due to the hardships that Rupert put him through whilst struggling with alcoholism. The singer said: "The last thing I did was hit my brother and I don’t have a problem with that because he deserved it.”
At the end of the 45-minute documentary, Will talks about how he has come to terms with his brother's passing and said that if he had the chance, he would tell Rupert that 'it's okay' and that he understands why he chose to end his life.
Channel 4's introduction to the documentary says: “Singer Will Young lived with his twin’s alcoholism for over 20 years, until Rupert died in 2020. Will’s shockingly honest and moving film explores the pain and drama of a loved one’s addiction.”
Will Young: Losing My Twin Rupert airs on Tuesday, May 10 at 10:05pm on Channel 4
