1. Ready your response for when people start saying Glastonbury has become ‘too commercial’ and lost its original spirit. Because this is absolute horse potatoes. At the very first Glastonbury in 1970, Marc Bolan turned up at the farm in a pink velvet-covered Rolls-Royce — ‘Don’t touch my car, man,’ he sneered as Michael Eavis tried to greet him — and refused to get out until he was paid (an agreement for an ongoing share of the milk profits was eventually reached).
2. If you think it’s ‘all about the music’, stay home and watch it on TV. I’ve been to Glastonbury plenty of times but never seen as many acts as I did last year when I was ill and watched it from my sofa. The BBC’s coverage is now comically comprehensive: allowing you to teleport between stages that onsite are ‘f*** that’ distances apart. That’s before you factor in chance bump-intos with that digital person from work who never says a word but has dropped acid for the first time in 20 years and wants to bro down.
