At first, it looks like love. He’s charming. Always generous, always attentive. He remembers your coffee order, listens to your stories, seems to share your pain. He tells you that you’re the only one who understands him. But as the relationship deepens, the warmth starts to fade. He becomes distant, defensive, unpredictable. You try harder to reconnect. You think: maybe it’s me.
This pattern of affection followed by withdrawal is often mistaken for the natural turbulence of intimacy. In fact, it can be a form of coercive control: a deliberate manipulation of attachment designed to entrap rather than connect.
