A good way to know if your partner genuinely supports and respects you is to take a peek at how you divvy up all of the responsibilities that adults have to do. If you’re the primary breadwinner, constantly work overtime, and do the lion’s share of the chores at home on top of everything else, then something’s definitely gone wrong.
User u/MisdiagnosedGlee went viral on r/pettyrevenge after sharing the story behind her decision to finally break things off with her (now ex) husband. Scroll down for an enthralling story about entitlement, laziness, and how being a situationally unaware ‘ding dong’ can come back to haunt you. Bored Panda has reached out to u/MisdiagnosedGlee via Reddit, and we’ll update the article once we hear back from her.
It’s a huge help if you and your partner can divide the responsibilities at home fairly. But problems pop up when there’s an imbalance
Image credits: Ketut Subiyanto (Not the actual photo)
A woman, who was the primary breadwinner and did most of the housework, revealed why she’d finally decided to divorce her ex-husband
Her partner refused to help her pack her things when they were moving homes
Image credits: Ron Lach (Not the actual photo)
The author broke down when she realized that she was getting no assistance from her husband
Image credits: Vitaly Gariev (Not the actual photo)
Eventually, she told him how she really felt and listed all of the things that he did wrong in the relationship
Image credits: cottonbro studio (Not the actual photo)
Image credits: MisdiagnosedGlee
Couples need to find a system that works for them, so they don’t feel like they’re overwhelmed with housework
From our perspective, the author of the post had the patience of a saint. Not only was she working herself to the bone, but she also took on the majority of the housework.
She also gave her ex-husband plenty of opportunities to pull himself together and start pitching in more. She repeatedly communicated her needs and concerns very clearly. Alas! Her partner had different priorities and made promises that he couldn’t keep. And he still had the gall to call out u/MisdiagnosedGlee for supposedly not doing enough for him despite being a kept man.
“I tell you, this ding dong is the absolute most obtuse, smooth-brained, intellectually deficient, situationally unaware, half-witted, opossum-brained clod to say that,” the author wrote, adding that she ended up sharing her unfiltered thoughts with the man and then kicked him out of her new home.
To be as straightforward as possible, even though a perfect 50/50 chore split is almost impossible, both partners need to find a system that works for them and their situation. In short, both sides need to put in the effort to share the workload, both in terms of chores and finances. But a lot will depend on each person’s character, as well as the family dynamics.
Someone who’s the primary breadwinner and works full-time might end up doing slightly less of the housework. Meanwhile, their partner might do more chores if they’re a stay-at-home parent, they work part-time, they have a fully remote job, or they’re blessed with flexible hours.
The important thing is that both sides are happy with the arrangement. If they’re not appreciated enough, though, they’ll likely end up feeling extremely frustrated for doing a necessary but thankless job, whether at the office or at home.
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (Not the actual photo)
Long-term relationships work well if both partners feel like they’re respected and supported
On top of that, just because someone works full-time doesn’t make them exempt from doing the dishes, taking out the trash, or picking up after themselves. Sure, they can ask their partner, who might be delighted to assist them, for help.
As a general rule, adults shouldn’t dodge their responsibilities. They need to do what needs to be done, when it needs to be done. Being overly lazy or acting entitled is going to harm your relationship in the long run.
There’s nothing wrong with relaxing with a good video game, reading a book, taking a nice long bath, meeting up with friends, eating some junk food, or getting cozy for a well-deserved nap after a long day. But problems pop up if that’s all you ever do.
The odds are that your partner also wants to enjoy their free time. They shouldn’t be forced to pick up after you while you’re having the time of your life. Couples need to behave like a real team. That requires having each other’s backs. Not just when things get dramatically tough but also during the monotonous daily grind.
However, if, despite both partners’ best efforts, chores continue to be a topic for constant arguments, they could always hire a house cleaner if their finances permit it. But even in these circumstances, one person shouldn’t behave like a teenager on summer break all the time. There’s a lot of purpose in life to be found beyond indulging in entertainment 24/7, whether that’s a purposeful career, creative work, or philanthropy.
Image credits: Pablo Heimplatz (Not the actual photo)
Someone who’s working overtime and exhausted expects their partner to do at least some of the housework
Something that u/MisdiagnosedGlee mentioned was that she worked 80 to 100 hours per week. No matter how tough and disciplined someone is, at some point, they’ll become overwhelmed and exhausted. All of us need time to rest and recharge if we want to do a quality job.
The reality is that the author of the post isn’t the only one in this sort of situation. Chronic exhaustion is a massive issue in the workforce.
Statista reports that in 2023, 22% of employees in the United States rated their current level of burnout as high or very high. Furthermore, 35% reported their burnout being at a moderate level.
However, a marketplace survey conducted by Deloitte puts these numbers even higher. According to the findings, 77% of respondents reported having experienced burnout at their current job. Over half revealed that it has happened more than once.
Image credits: Christian Erfurt (Not the actual photo)