Game clock has run down for Chris Beard

Texas Longhorns head coach Chris Beard looks on during the second half of the game against the Illinois Fighting Illini at Madison Square Garden on December 6 in New York City. (Dustin Satloff/Getty Images)

In my experience, it’s a rare man who wakes up at age 49 and starts beating up women. Chances are, then, that this wasn’t University of Texas basketball coach Chris Beard’s first rodeo. It’s just that nobody’s ever called the cops before.

Or if they did, the cops quietly tiptoed away.