To hell with consistency: "untyping" has hit the dating scene to shake things up, perhaps for the better.
Rather than succumb to dating burnout, singles are thinking outside the box and parting ways with the norms in a partner they once considered to be dealbreakers. In fact, engagement ring specialists Angelic Diamonds and Amber Brooks, editor-in-chief at DatingAdvice.com, discovered that untyping is one of the top 10 trends that will make a significant impact this summer, along with the likes of infla-dating and mosting.
Maybe there's something to be said about deviating from your usual type? You don't know unless you try, right?
"When you don’t have a specific type in mind, you are more likely to be open to meeting and getting to know people who you may not have considered before," Pippa Murphy, the sex and relationship expert at condoms.uk., tells us. “That being said, untyping also comes with its own set of negatives."
Before you begin your search for the Timothée Chalamet to your Kylie Jenner, here's a 360-degree look at the new dating fad.
What is 'untyping'? All about the dating trend
Just as it sounds—as the Timothée/Kylie mention suggests—untyping is when daters decide to find romantic partners who do not fit the description of their typical type.
If you're the lady who usually goes for the sports-minded significant other, this would mean opting for the opposite. Or perhaps you're a homebody who appreciates a good Netflix marathon on the couch? This would mean seeking out the thrill-seeking jet-setter who can't stay in one place for too long.
Your dating pool is bound to grow when you start swiping with more of an open mind, but what exactly does untyping entail?
What are the pros of 'untyping'?
Not only are you bound to find more matches on Hinge vs. Bumble if you start untyping, but you're likely to learn a few new things about yourself in the process.
"I believe that untyping can be a sign of personal growth," Murphy adds. "For some people, it actually shows that you’re becoming more self-aware and are willing to challenge your own preconceptions and biases about what you’re looking for in a partner."
Likewise, it can take the weight off your shoulders about checking off different boxes when dating. Things won't feel quite so rigid now that you're open to more interactions.
"You can focus more on getting to know the person as an individual, rather than trying to make them fit into a preconceived idea of what you're looking for," Murphy adds.
What are the negatives of untyping?
Sure, it's okay to stray away from your usual—something that is likely to cause a little confusion along the way—but if you take the notion of untyping too far, you're liable to match with someone with too many inconsistent beliefs.
"You should never date someone who has different values to you, as they are fundamental to a relationship," Murphy adds. "Compromising too much on these standards can lead to a relationship that is unfulfilling or even harmful."
Things to keep in mind while trying untyping
If you're considering exploring new possibilities with partners you might not have otherwise engaged with, here's what Murphy suggests are untyping red flags:
- You disregard what feels off because the person is making you happy
- You're excusing behavior that you'd normally not tolerate
- You cannot pinpoint what's off about your relationship
- You cannot be yourself around this person
- Your S.O. never asks about you
Although the method could help dispel stereotypes and prevent you from limiting yourself, do pay attention to your core values—those shouldn't change with a partner, no matter what "type" he or she might be.
