GOING, GOING … GONE?
You wait years for a tournament to be awarded to a host country and then 11 come at once. Swiftly following news that the UK and Ireland’s infrastructural expertise will be tested by hosting Euro 2028 came the announcement that the 2030 World Cup will be shared between six countries and across three continents. The Net Zero World Cup, if you will. A 12th host country will be soon incoming if the inescapable hum around Saudi Arabia staging 2034 is anything to go by. Australia, having co-hosted a flamin’ highly successful Women’s World Cup, were given just 25 days to give good PowerPoint for an event 11 years off. The Saudi bid is already in. “Hosting a Fifa World Cup in 2034 would help us achieve our dream of becoming a leading nation in world sport,” roared Saudi minister of sport Prince Abdulaziz bin Turki Al Faisal.
Gone are the days when announcements were made in glitzy ballrooms, the tension mounting among dignitaries. It turns out that the December 2010 day when Davids Beckham and Cameron were accompanied by Prince William to Zurich, and had to sit stone-faced as Russia took the 2018 prize, with Vladimir Putin pronouncing “soccer is popular”, was the last of its kind. Considering the problems that and awarding Qatar the 2022 tourney caused for Fifa’s suits, what with the FBI getting involved and Chuck Blazer playing whistleblower on his fellow freeloaders, perhaps it’s now safer to work out where World Cups will be hosted via good old-fashioned, er, diplomacy. In co-hosting 2030, the Uefa, Conmebol and Caf confederations left the road open to Asia hosting again, seeing as USA USA USA, Mexico and Canada are looking after the Air Miles World Cup in 2026.
Saudi Arabia bidding for the Human Rights World Cup II has a few well-placed advocates. “Clearly in the right place, now and for the future,” roared Riyad Mahrez, of Al-Ahli, reported wages £45m-a-year, on social media disgrace TwiXer. “Amazing to see Saudi Arabia bid for the big one. Wow, amazing news,” whooped Karim Benzema, of Al-Ittihad, reported wages £258m over three seasons. “Very excited about the announcement,” hurrahed Jordan Henderson, not actually there for the money and who played in front of a crowd of 976 for Al-Ettifaq last week.
Henderson’s gaffer, Steven Gerrard joined the throng, posting a picture of a packed stadium and tooting: “Incredible to think that the 11-year journey to a home Fifa World Cup might have already started for some of my youth players. Hard work starts now.” He was then only too happy to tell TV reporters of his overflowing elation. “Very very happy for everyone in Saudi,” he droned in the tone any Englishman adopts when trying to make locals understand them. When enthusiasm flows like that, then Saudi 2034 is surely irresistible.
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QUOTE OF THE DAY
“To be honest where I live is not what I see of Los Angeles on TV. I’ve done the open-top bus around Beverly Hills and that’s the moment where you think, I’m in LA. But that’s too hustle-bustle. I like it more relaxing, that’s why I chose to live by the beach which I’m lucky to do. It’s much more enjoyable for the family as well. It’s been amazing, waking up, the sun’s shining, and I’m doing the best job in the world. Football is what I love doing and to do it in the sun makes it better” – Sheffield United legend Billy Sharp, 78, on kissing the sun in California, where he’s scoring for fun in a late-career swan song with the Galaxy.
TOP BILLING THIS WEEKEND
The big Premier League match this weekend is Arsenal v Manchester City and if it grabs our attention anything like the tyre-track chic knitwear Pep Guardiola wore at his pre-match press conference it should live up to its top billing. The bold threads are clearly giving Guardiola confidence. Without Rodri, John Stones and Kevin De Bruyne, was he worried about losing back-to-back top-flight games for the first time in five years? “It shows how good we have done … 2018!” he trilled. “We have done incredible. The manager is so good!”
FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS
I think I have the solution to Liverpool’s VAR dilemma (Football Daily letters passim). It involves using one of this season’s fetishes to fix another. Instead of a VAR-induced replay, let’s add 90 minutes of injury time to the end of the next Spurs-Liverpool match. Done and dusted” – Mike Wilner.
Re: Jürgen Klopp’s call for a replay. How about making it a charity fundraiser instead, with the proceeds going to programmes to recruit and train a new generation of (good/competent) referees or VARs? Only half joking” – Simon Dahlman.
Maybe I’m being too highbrow (there’s a first for everything), but after just two matchdays, the inescapable, mute-button-defying pomposity of the Big Cup theme music has me envying Van Gogh, maybe even Trotsky. What kind of big audio dynamite will it take to make this ersatz grandeur go away?” – Clinton Macsherry.
All those who hype the weekend fixture as an early title decider, calm down. You do not know Arsenal!” – Krishna Moorthy.
Send your letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s winner of our prizeless letter o’ the day is … Clinton Macsherry.
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