Until last night at nine o’clock, no one could say it was anything approaching a classic Glasto. Lana del Rey was shunted to the Other Stage (eventually being escorted offstage by security after repeatedly misunderstanding the curfew), while Guns N’ Roses embarrassed themselves on the Pyramid Stage (Slash was predictably effervescent but Axl Rose basically can’t sing anymore). Lizzo (she should have headlined) was reduced to a supporting role and the only top-billed act who lived up to their reputation were the continually transformative and monstrously good Arctic Monkeys.
Sure, the sun shone all weekend, and there was the usual sense of otherworldly bonhomie, but when Rick Astley and Cat Stevens (the audience obviously had no idea who the latter was, although to their credit they appeared to know his songs) are your secret weapon, you know something’s not quite right with the world.
