Dorota, 51, London
Occupation Consultant pathologist for the NHS and the private sector
Voting record Does not have a British passport, so can only vote in local elections, in which she has always voted Lib Dem. In Poland, usually centre-left
Amuse bouche Dorota was once detained in Egypt for taking a train without a ticket
Ian, 44, London
Occupation Owns a micro social media enterprise that helps larger companies navigate public procurement
Voting record For Blair a couple of times, and Labour in recent local elections, but generally Conservative
Amuse bouche Ian’s wife is Colombian and he enjoys Colombian traditional dance
For starters
Dorota I spotted him immediately – he was on his own, he looked a bit stressed and he fitted the profile.
Ian The photographer had large tattoos on his calves, and after he’d finished, Dorota said, “I hate tattoos, have you got tattoos?” And I said, “I certainly do not.”
Dorota I had some cheese fondue, then a beetroot salad.
Ian As she was telling me she wasn’t a vegetarian but didn’t eat meat, I got confused and flustered, and ordered the escargots and the Malabar fish curry.
The big beef
Dorota We didn’t argue about immigration as such: he has a very mixed background and it would have been weird for someone with such a pedigree to be against migration. His background is German/Scottish/Jewish/South African/Welsh, and he has a Colombian wife. But we voted differently on Brexit. I am very pro-European. He voted with his heart, on emotions not facts, which was strange for such a hard-headed and informed guy. The second thing was – he didn’t think it would matter. He thought, “The Brexiters will lose by a margin, and we’ll conclude that some people are unhappy in Europe, but it’ll never actually happen.” For me, it’s unimaginable that someone can think that his vote wouldn’t matter.
Ian Dorota was hitting me in the face with logic, sense and facts, which I thought was unfair. Although I voted leave, I think there’s a big chunk of us who are neither remainers nor Brexiters. I made my decision in the last week of the campaign and could have gone either way. She really believes in a United States of Europe, and believes that’s the natural thing to happen. Her argument was quite strong – when you think that Italy and Germany only came into being in the 1800s, why shouldn’t more countries conjoin? I’d never thought of that, even though I’ve studied this. I put my leftwing argument really badly – the EU not being great for the working classes. Her arguments were more convincing.
Sharing plate
Dorota We talked about the NHS, but I didn’t want to criticise it. I think the public system which is free for everyone is the right one – it’s fantastic. He asked me how much spending, in terms of the percentage of GDP, is enough. I have no idea – I just think the more, the better. He was surprised at the piecemeal privatisation, that it’s not only about the management, the catering, the cleaning – it’s also about medical services.
Ian She started telling me about outsourcing of clinical services. If you can find someone who can tell you how the NHS works, especially if they’re far more intelligent and capable than you, which she is, that’s like gold dust.
Dorota The main driver is price, not quality. They only think about turnaround times and money, and those aren’t always the right measures. I think I was able to explain that to him.
Ian You have to put limits on it. You can’t outsource and privatise everything.
For afters
Dorota His best friend from childhood was Polish, and he’s spent time in Poland. He knew my home town, Kraków. He’s very smart, well-read, educated.
Ian I know how to order a beer and ponce a cigarette in Polish, and other weird words, which she was impressed by. I was there in 95, 96, when KFC and McDonald’s suddenly appeared.
Takeaways
Dorota We started talking at 7pm and we didn’t stop till after midnight. Then they kicked us out of the restaurant, so we walked and walked and walked. I said, “Why are all the pubs closed?” and he said, “Because of Brexit, maybe?” He had a nice sense of humour.
Ian We got on really well. She’s invited me over for dinner with my wife. I could tell she was concerned that I might be a complete rightwinger, but I’m not.
Additional reporting: Sarah Hooper
• Dorota and Ian ate at Brasserie Blanc, London
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