A dad was left cracking up after he accidentally gave his kids 'porn sweets' as a treat when he returned from a holiday in Benidorm.
James Austin went to visit his father on the Costa Blanca last weekend and decided to bring back a little gift for his children.
Stopping at a candy shop to buy presents, he grabbed some bags of sweets, which he thought to be a Spanish equivalent for Haribo.
However, it was only after he got home and he'd already given the sweets to his three boys, 13-year-old William and Oliver Austin and Samuel Austin, 10, that he discovered his mistake.
The sweets were in fact not appropriate for the youngsters as they were very X-rated, with each bag boasting a colourful assortment of erect penises, sperm cells, vaginas and pairs of bum cheeks and breasts.
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The 47-year-old parent was mortified by his mistake - but it did give him and wife Helen Austin, 43, a good laugh.
His eldest child pointed out his blunder after opening the sweets and the dad quickly gathered them all up to avoid a "crisis" if their youngest child started asking questions.
Safe to say the sweets, which James claims tasted "vile", ended up in the bin.
The dad says the bags, purchased from Candy Shop Diana, were displayed around waist height and were among other regular sweets so that's why he didn't think to inspect their shape.
He revealed all about the embarrassing incident in a LinkedIn post, denouncing himself as 'a terrible dad' for not realising his error earlier, but he's relieved he's dodged having to explain the rude treats to Samuel.
James, from Derby, Derbyshire, said: "It was a big parenting fail on my part but we made light of it.
"I couldn't deal with the conversation that it would have sparked with Samuel. He's got another two or three years until that sort of stuff is taught at school.
"I just wanted to get them a little treat, like you always do when you go away. I just assumed it was the Spanish Haribo.
"There weren't any labels on them and the bags were surrounded by lollipops and kiddy-type stuff, so I didn't expect a waist-high shelf to be selling that sort of confectionery.
"The kids have normally got sweets stashed in various areas in their bedrooms, so when I dished them out they scuttled upstairs.
"It wasn't until later on that evening until William came down in fits of laughter and asked 'have you seen these sweets, dad?', and me and Helen just looked at each other confused.
"When he brought them down and showed me the sperm one, he was still in hysterics and I didn't know how to reach."
He continued: "It suddenly dawned on me that Samuel might be about to open his so I quickly retrieved them from his room without him seeing and threw them straight in the bin.
"Once the crisis was averted, we had a good laugh at it. They're all very detailed.
"I did try one of them, and they were vile anyway. I sort of bit it, said 'nope' then put them all in the bin. Samuel did ask where his sweets had gone, but I told him they were off.
"Helen's just been rolling her eyes at me, but I'm glad everyone enjoyed my post."
The dad-of-three claims he's learned his lesson and will be sure to check the contents of sweets before handing them over to his kids in future.
Thankfully the boys didn't go without as he'd also got them large lollipops and a giant Milka chocolate bar on his travels too.
The teens have had a good chuckle about the sweets though, telling pals at school - and James thinks some of their parents will have seen his LinkedIn post too.
The post, which has been liked and commented on more than 1,000 times, said: "I am a terrible father. On my last day in Benidorm, I went on a little shopping spree. I paid a visit to Candy Shop Diana, a lovely sweet shop selling lollies and other delights for the kiddies.
"I bought three bags of sweets and three large lollipops (Ninja Turtle, Pikachu and Super Mario). When the kids got home I gave them the goodies and also a huge Milka Oreo Chocolate Bar.
"Later on that evening William appeared and said, 'have you seen these sweets?' He had spotted that they were 18+ rated and was in fits of laughter. I genuinely had not noticed.
"I very quickly ran into the 10-year-olds room, retrieved them and threw them straight in the bin. I know that seems a waste but they also tasted bloody vile as well.
"The moral of the story is... Well, I don't really know. Have a great day everyone."
Many commented on the viral post, with one person saying: "Oh man, I am laughing out loud. I guess the moral of the story is to always read the label?"
Another wrote: "Don't choose the vagina one, you'll get short-changed with the hole in the middle."
While a Psychotherapist Rozmin Mukhi joked the kids will need therapy one day, adding: "I will give you a 10 per cent discount when your kids are ready for therapy!!"
Candy Shop Diana have been contacted for comment.
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