After my German shepherd mix passed away, I wasn’t ready to adopt another dog. But my single-girl condo felt empty. So when I got an e-mail about two guinea pigs who needed a home, I thought, “Perfect! How hard could it be?” Looking back, I realize that Alicia Silverstone had nothing on how clueless I was.
Don’t get me wrong, Duke and Bogart are cute, charismatic and perpetually doing things that make me laugh. But I would never recommend guinea pigs to my friends with kids—for a lot of reasons.
First of all, guinea pigs put you through an approval process that’s similar to the one you use when you meet people on Tinder. Guinea pigs require you to convince them that they should like you. And even then, some will never like to be picked up or held. And after you’ve been bitten, you learn your lesson.
