Christine McGuinness has admitted she feels 'petrified' over being a single parent, following her split from Paddy McGuinness.
The 34-year-old former Real Housewives of Cheshire star announced her split from Top Gear host Paddy, 49, after months of speculation in July last year.
Months on from the confirmed break-up, Christine has revealed the idea of being a single parent "petrifies" her.
She candidly discussed her childhood abuse in an interview with OK! magazine ahead of the release of her documentary, Unmasking My Autism, and revealed how being single leaves her feeling "vulnerable".
Christine, who wed Paddy in 2011 after meeting in 2007, explained: "When I met my husband, that’s a time where I felt very safe and I wonder if that’s why I stayed in that relationship for 15 years."
She added: "We’re separated now and I know being a single woman, being a single parent is an extremely vulnerable place to be and it absolutely petrifies me, but that’s life."
Christine shares three children with ex-husband Paddy; twins Penelope and Leo, both nine, and seven-year-old Felicity. All of their children have been diagnosed with autism.
But she isn't ready to date again after the breakdown of her marriage.
When asked how she is navigating the world of dating, she said: "I'm not navigating it, there is no navigation!
"Dating was never on my mind when I was filming the documentary. Really not. But I think watching it, hopefully, you know, people will understand why.
"I think most people will was expect somebody who's just come out of a long relationship to maybe be really excited about dating. But it's just not something I thinking about.
"I can't even imagine what it must be like. I been in one place for a long time and I don't like change. So I'm certainly not going to be speed dating anytime soon. No! Absolutely."
"I just really want to focus on the children, focus on your work. I'm really excited about this documentary coming out. And I hope people understand more about how I feel about relationships after watching the documentary."
She previously discussed the horrific abuse she endured during her childhood – which began from age nine – in which she prayed she 'wouldn't wake up'.
In her new BBC documentary Christine, who was diagnosed with autism as an adult, discussed her marriage to ex Paddy.
Reflecting on what she discovered in her documentary about autism, the model said: "I felt like I said in the film I didn’t want my family to ever fall apart. And that’s why I stayed married.
"As an autistic woman, I like to stay where I am comfortable. I like things to stay the same. And so that’s something I suppose I chose to do... But sometimes change has to happen."
The couple announced their split in June last year Christine and Paddy released a joint statement. It said: "We hadn't planned on sharing this publicly until we were ready but after the lack of privacy surrounding our personal life, we feel left with no other option but to clarify.
"A while ago we took the difficult decision to separate but our main focus as always is to continue loving and supporting our children."
