The Speaker of the House of Commons, Sir Lindsay Hoyle, has really gone and done it now.
He’s only gone and referred Josh Taylor’s controversial win over Jack Catterall in their super-lightweight boxing title fight to the Metropolitan Police in London.
The intention being to force a review by independent judges that would allow for the fight decision to be changed retrospectively.
Can you imagine?
The Speaker should have more to do with his time, given what’s going on in the world at the moment, even if Catterall is one of his constituents in Chorley.
Leaving that aside, he has come up with the kind of hare-brained notion that could give some people ideas if they think police intervention and legal action might overturn results they don’t like.
If it was a European tie at Ibrox, for instance, strewn with questionable offside decisions, disallowed goals and hotly
contested penalty-kick awards you could get Interpol and Police Scotland involved.
Or you might find a spate of complaints concerning a corner kick that never was in West Lothian during a Premiership match last weekend.
Or foul play not detected in the build-up to a goal for Rangers against Aberdeen the day before.
The possibilities are endless now an idea has been planted in minds that are full of the title race with eight hearings – sorry, games – left to be negotiated.
The less excitable, of course, might be inclined to leave PC Plod well alone.
There are some Celtic supporters who believe Rangers ’ continued participation in Europe, and their own team’s exit from continental
competition, automatically adds up to a Premiership title win for Ange Postecoglou at the end of the season.
I know this to be true because I was called a “Patsy” and a “Rangers puppet” on live radio by two separate people on Tuesday evening, all because I fundamentally disagreed with that proposition.
Ibrox chairman Douglas Park couldn’t afford a puppet.
He’s already paying Aaron Ramsey £25,000 a week to sit on a bench.
How much would moveable objects cost?
But I explained the ground rules when I rejoined these pages two years ago.
Born into the green half of Glasgow but not green enough for those who dislike negative comment about their club.
Born into the green half of the city and therefore instantly unacceptable to the blue half on a matter of principle.
I serve as an independent, able to say what I like – such as disagreeing with Gordon Strachan when he says that Scott Brown’s goal against Rangers at Ibrox in a draw last October was a potential title-winner.
That’s daft.
Does that mean if Rangers win the league it’s Giorgos Giakoumakis’ fault because he missed a penalty in a draw with Livingston at Celtic Park on Saturday, October 30?
Of course not.
There is no convenient formula that fits football, as we’ll discover over the next 48 hours, where Celtic and Rangers are concerned.
On the basis that Giovanni Van Bronckhorst ’s side played Red Star Belgrade on what we’ll call a fairly eventful Thursday night at Ibrox, and Europe brings the prospect of injury and tiredness, they should be at greater risk of elimination from the Scottish Cup today when they face Dundee at Dens Park.
Even if the hand of fate appears to have Dens manager Mark McGhee by the throat and pinned to the wall judging by results, altercations with fans and Covid-19 related difficulties in the dressing room.
At the same time, Celtic have had a seven-day, uninterrupted period of rest since beating Livi so convincingly last Sunday.
That should make them a shoo-in when they take on Dundee United at Tannadice tomorrow night.
Is that how it works?
I think I’ll call Police Scotland and report a fraudulent theory.
One proposition I do support is John Hartson’s suspicion that a bad decision by a referee, or a series of questionable calls,
could help determine who wins the league.
But is that any different this season from any other?
Call the police and press one for “honest mistakes.”
Press two for “conspiracy theories”.
Or just hang up and think about what you’re doing while you let the players get on with deciding who finishes where.
