A cafe boss has defended telling a new mum to be 'more discreet' when breastfeeding that prompted her to storm out - blaming it on customers who had complained. Molly Musto visited Gallagher's of Barnsley with fiancé Thomas Veale and seven-week-old Bobby Musto-Veale.
The mum-of-one claims that as she pushed the pram through the door, the female co-owner approached them and told her she was fine to breastfeed but had to be more discreet 'like other mums'. The 22-year-old said the confrontation ended with her declaring that if Molly 'adhered' to this she could stay.
The self-employed rabbit bonder refused, turned on her heels and walked out following the encounter that left the pair, including 6ft 6in trainee teacher Thomas 'shaken'. A sweet snap documenting Molly's first time breastfeeding in public at the cafe shows the beaming new mum holding the newborn infant to her chest around a month earlier when Bobby was just two days old.
However Gallagher's of Barnsley defended their actions and said they were simply 'passing on the comment[s] of a customer' who had complained to them and it was not their opinion that Molly should be more discreet.
Molly said: "We opened the [café] door. Firstly the woman asked 'how are you?' and then she said 'I need to have a word with you'.
"We hadn't even sat down, she came to the door. It was one of the two owners.
"I expected it to be something like 'oh there's a bit of a food shortage' I didn't expect it was going to be personal.
"She said 'you're welcome to breastfeed but you need to be more discreet about it like the other women who come here. If you can adhere to that then stay'.
"I was like 'no I'm not adhering to that'. I'm going to assume it's something like cover her head, but I don't know.
"She was rather confrontational about it, it left me shaken.
"As she was saying that I was angry to be honest to begin with because she's seven weeks old.
"If she needs feeding, she needs feeding. But I also felt uncomfortable.
"We came somewhere that we knew we wanted to sit and have food and the next minute, we felt like we had to leave. We weren't welcome."
In a Facebook review, Molly wrote: "Returned today after visiting previously, with our six-week-old.
"Was aggressively confronted 'I am welcome to breastfeed, but it needs to be more discreet'.
"After feeding my newborn here a couple of weeks ago, was absolutely distraught to be made uncomfortable in a family-friendly establishment.
"We had to leave and find somewhere where I can feed my daughter without judgment!"
Molly said the confrontation was 'worse' as it was something the woman had thought about since their last visit a month earlier.
Molly said: "When she was two days old I fed her there and nothing was said and I fed her again on the six-day-old one [visit].
"We actually did our first public feed there. I was just holding her. I asked my partner to take a photo because it was the first time feeding in public and I was like 'ah I've done it'.
"Then when we came back we were stopped at the door. She'd remembered to have this chat with us regarding it despite not going for about four weeks.
"It makes it a bit worse on our part because it wasn't even like I was feeding her, she just knew that I might have to feed her while we were there.
"The first two visits were really lovely. It was a welcoming, safe place, we'd just been to town and somewhere that we found that we liked and we were getting on with the staff.
"The majority of the time it's been empty.
"We were trying to support local, because you know what small businesses are like at the minute, and then we end up in a chain because of what happened."
Molly said the experience has left her more wary of breastfeeding Bobby in public and she won't returning to Gallagher's of Barnsley.
Molly said: "It's nerve-wracking breastfeeding in public especially to be told by a woman, you expect them to be a bit more understanding.
"My partner was also really shaken up - someone confronted us both about something we don't feel like we did wrong.
"Also I'd not been in for a month so she'd remembered and obviously sat and thought about it, it felt very personal.
"I'm just a bit more wary when I'm feeding her of what people are thinking, a bit more worried that people are going to say stuff.
Subscribe here for the latest news where you live
"I've always been so confident and just got on with it, it has knocked it [my confidence] a bit.
"I won't be going back there again. I've filed an official complaint and they've said they'll come back to me in seven days, [but] whether anything will come out of that, I don't know.
"I hope that they re-think their policy. They're lovely people, but it's just different views that are a bit old and need to be freshened up a little."
However the cafe hit back and blamed the incident on other customers having complained and said they were simply 'passing on' their feedback to Molly.
A spokesperson for Gallagher's of Barnsley said: "We regularly have quite a few ladies breastfeeding, so this is nothing new to us.
"The second time she came in, a member of staff served her and she was quite off with the member of staff.
"They brought a lot of shopping in with them. They had to leave it all around the table.
"They had no disturbance [during] the breastfeeding, and then left.
"However, on leaving, the staff member approached her and said 'what about your rubbish?' and she said, 'well that's for you to deal with', and walked off quite angrily.
"The member of staff approached her [next time she came in] and said, 'there's a couple of things I need to chat to you about before you move forward'.
"She spoke to her about the rubbish and her behaviour towards staff, and said, 'just to point out that when you were here last time, two members of the public had approached us and said that they felt it wasn't really discreet [how] you're breastfeeding.'
"The staff member went to get some menus and get them sat down, and the woman said, 'I'm not breastfeeding discreetly', turned around and stormed out of the place.
"It's not us. It's passing on the comment of a customer.
"When she was in at the time when she made people feel uncomfortable, she says she wasn't spoken to then. [That's because] the law says she can't be spoken to then.
"There has been a hate campaign against our business being raised by somebody on social media.
"However, we are getting a lot of support from breastfeeding women who are still coming into our cafe. I would fully understand if five or six people went onto social media and said this is a horrendous place to be, but that is not the case. This is one person who said they were unhappy.
"We have resolved the issue, there are untruths in the statement and we would just like to move on from this. We welcome anyone breastfeeding in our premises."
