A brother has sparked a debate after banning his sister from wearing high heels to their holiday house party.
In a post to the Am I the ***hole forum on Reddit, a 34-year-old man (@Cultural-Okra-8538) explained that he and his wife banned high heels at their parties after his 25-year-old sister’s friend wore heels to a birthday party they hosted the previous month and consequently dented the floor. Although he wrote that his sister told her friend to take them off at the time, the friend refused to comply.
“I told my sister to worry about it later, but after the party, we saw the entire living room was covered in deep dents,” he wrote. “However thanks to my sister getting her friend to take her heels off, we avoided too much damage in the kitchen and hallway.”
Despite knowing that her heels would cause damage, the friend wore them anyway, according to the brother. “She didn’t care at all about the floor damage she caused,” he said. “My sister tried to get her to pay the repair bill, but the friend smirked, said that she was just making our floors look ‘lived in’ and my sister should be the one paying for rudely making her take off shoes that made her outfit.”
He continued: “My sister was livid and ended the friendship immediately,” before adding: “She felt terrible, blamed herself for inviting that friend, and said she would pay for repairs. My wife and I said no, as it wasn’t her fault and she also prevented any more damage from occurring by noticing before anyone else had, and we comforted her and don’t blame her.”
By the time Christmas rolled around, and he and his wife found themselves hosting another party, they jointly decided to ban their guests from wearing heels to prevent the same incident from happening. But when the man’s sister - a fan of stilettos - asked him if she could still wear her heels, she was in for a rude awakening.
“My sister isn’t inviting the former friend who wrecked the floors or anyone remotely supportive of her actions, but we feel the potential for damage is too great still if someone unintentionally wears worn-out heels,” he wrote. “My sister is very upset by this as she hates wearing anything but stiletto heels, and this is a party where everyone will dress up.”
He added that his sister maintained that her stilettos were in good condition and wouldn’t cause damage, and she also suggested that he inspect their guest’s footwear before they came inside the house.
The brother continued to write: “She also said she would pay for fixing the floor should damage occur, again offered to pay the previous repair bill, but we don’t want this as my sister earns less than we do and the repair would be very costly for her, plus repairs are inconvenient.”
“My sister has been begging us to let her wear heels to the party, and tearfully asked if we wanted to punish her for the damage from her birthday party, but that isn’t the case at all,” he added. “However, I understand how much this hurts her, and I wonder if we should let her wear the shoes she wants or just remove the high heel ban.”
People were split in the comment section of the post, with some offering advice on the situation, while others disagreed with the brother’s ban. “You can’t dictate the shoes your guests wear,” one Reddit user commented. “Have a shoes-off policy or put down mats and rugs.”
“Plot twist: Allow all types of footwear, then ask everyone to leave their shoes at the door and provide little booties! Many cultures do not allow outdoor shoes inside,” someone else wrote, while another added: “Sounds like you’re being a bit harsh, maybe let her wear the damn shoes. Not that big of a deal.”
Others suggested that the sister take preventative measures. One person wrote: “But those stiletto heel stoppers - could be a compromise. While meant for grass, some people actually use them regularly to prevent wear and tear, even indoors.”
