Largely missed in the “nepo baby” discourse of December was the fact that the majority of nepo babies are… sort of great? Jeff Bridges. Jane Fonda. Laura Dern. Sofia Coppola. Legends! Riley Keough. Dakota Johnson. The assorted Skarsgards. Brilliant! Maya Hawke. Maude Apatow. Jack Quaid. Nepo zygotes with undeniable skill and charisma! Yes, all were born into the moneyed bosom of Hollywood privilege, as if a stork dropped them off outside the Warner Bros backlot. But the vast majority of stars-born-to-stars quickly justify their fame through their work – so you can’t really question what they’re bringing to the table. Unless, of course, that star is Brooklyn Beckham. And the table is in your kitchen. And what’s being brought to it is a roasted beef joint as pink as a Question Time audience member.
This week, Beckham – the career-hopping son of David and Victoria – sparked giggles with an Instagram video in which he enthusiastically demonstrated how to cook a traditional Sunday roast. It wasn’t the best. Beckham has made a habit of this kind of thing. There was his “experimental” cocktail last November that was more or less a gin and tonic, and last October’s 10-minute US TV segment in which he painstakingly put together… a bacon, sausage and egg sandwich. For his roast, Beckham slathered his potatoes and vegetables in a river of oil, before not so much cooking his beef as blowing gently on it. Cows walking past the kitchen would be better brazed. The resulting dinner was met with various degrees of hostility in the comments section. “Heart attack on a plate,” wrote one meanie. “A good vet could bring that back to life,” wrote another.
