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Louise Thomas
Editor
A bride has sparked outrage because she’s forcing her bridesmaid to wear a dress that she doesn’t think looks good on her.
In a recent post shared to the popular “Am I the A**hole?” Reddit forum, the woman claimed that she was asking her friend to wear a bridesmaid dress that “made her look ‘fat.’” She then described some elements she wants to incorporate into her wedding, noting that she loves “the aesthetics of the Regency era.”
She explained that she wanted her wedding party to wear “empire waist dresses,” similar to outfits she’d seen on Pride and Prejudice and Bridgerton. She then revealed that all of her bridesmaids “love this idea,” except for one, feels like the style of these bridesmaid dresses doesn’t suit her body.
“[The bridesmaid] claims that the dress looks unflattering on her due to her body proportions. She has broad shoulders, a large chest, large arms, a small waist, and thin legs. She claims that due to the high waistline and her large chest, her waist appears much larger than it actually is,” she wrote. “She also says that that type of dress emphasizes her thick arms.”
According to the bride-to-be, her friend not only felt like the type of dress made “her look fat,” but it also “triggered her past body dysmorphia and insecurities.”
When the bridesmaid asked if she could “modify her dress to define her figure,” the future bride turned her request down since she wanted all the bridesmaids to “wear the same dress” and she “didn’t want” her friend “to stand out.” However, the Reddit user then noted that she disagreed with her bridesmaid about the situation.
“She said I was being selfish and that I wasn’t taking into account other people’s body types. I said she was acting extremely entitled, it’s my wedding and I shouldn’t have to cater to her insecurities,” she concluded.
The post has quickly gone viral, with more than 6,100 upvotes, as of July 30. In the comments, many people criticized the bride, with claims that she should be more considerate of how these dresses look on her bridesmaids. They also hit back at the woman’s claim that all her bridesmaids must wear the same dresses.
“Unfortunately, many of the empire waist dresses commercially available are NOT made for busty women. Its [sic] one of my pet peeves about movie regency, Nicola Coughlan is the only actress who fills out the dresses properly,” one wrote, referring to the lead in Bridgerton, which is about the Regency era in England.
AITA for making my bridesmaid wear a dress that makes her look “fat”?
byu/Infamouszealous inAmItheAsshole
“I’ll never understand this idea that bridesmaids have to wear the same exact style of dress when everyone has different body types. What looks great on a size two might not look great on a size 14. What looks amazing on a taller figure might look strange on someone of a shorter stature. I can understand a color preference for photos, but why force everyone into a box?” another wrote.
“This is someone who is supposed to be close to you, a friend, a family member. She expressed concerns that make her extremely uncomfortable and you are being rude to her about it,” a third responded. “She’s right, some people’s body types are just not flattering in some things. You’re choosing something that doesn’t look good, and you could easily work something out to alter the dress to make her feel comfortable but still keep the theme.”
However, there were a few people who had mixed reactions to the situation, noting that they understand why the bride wants to make the call on bridesmaids dresses.
“Nothing wrong with you wanting a certain style for your wedding. Nothing wrong with your bridesmaid asking for a change because of her own concerns. And nothing wrong with you asking her to stick to the plan. The solution here is for her to not be a bridesmaid any more,” one wrote.
“As the bride, it is absolutely your right to choose the bridesmaid dresses. But, enforcing your aesthetic over the comfort of someone who is supposed to be your friend isn’t kind,” another agreed. “You can decide what is more important to you, and she can then determine whether continuing to be in the wedding party is in her best interest.”
