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Donata Leskauskaite

“It’s Frowned-Upon”: Billie Eilish Challenges Taboos Related To Women’s Pleasure

Billie Eilish candidly addressed taboos related to women’s sexuality and masturbation while reflecting on the challenges of being labeled and misunderstood in the public eye, including her sexual identity, ahead of her third album, Hit Me Hard and Soft, set to be released on May 17.

In a Rolling Stone exposé of the songstress published on Wednesday (April 24), Billie revealed that her favorite way of decompressing was having “sex,” emphasizing that she loved talking about it “any time [she] possibly can.”

Stressing that sex was “literally [her] favorite topic,” the 22-year-old singer explained: “My experience as a woman has been that it’s seen in such a weird way. 

“People are so uncomfortable talking about it and weirded out when women are very comfortable in their sexuality and communicative [about] it. 

“I think it’s such a frowned-upon thing to talk about, and I think that should change. 

“You asked me what I do to decompress? That sh*t can really, really save you sometimes, just saying. Can’t recommend it more, to be real.”

Billie Eilish addressed societal taboos on women’s sexuality and masturbation while navigating the complexities of her identity

Image credits: Jason Armond /Getty Images

Billie spoke out about the taboo of female masturbation, emphasizing its role in boosting her confidence and coping with body issues and dysmorphia throughout her life.

“TMI, but self-pleasure is an enormous, enormous part of my life, and a huge, huge help for me,” she confessed, adding: “People should be jerking it, man. I can’t stress it enough, as somebody with extreme body issues and dysmorphia that I’ve had my entire life.”

The What Was I Made For? hitmaker further admitted that she found masturbating “hot” and that it enabled her to make “a raw, deep connection to [herself] and [her] body, and have a love for [her] body that [she has] not really ever had.” 

Billie told Rolling Stone: “I got to say, looking at yourself in the mirror and thinking ‘I look really good right now’ is so helpful.”

Image credits: billieeilish

“You can manufacture the situation you’re in to make sure you look good. 

“You can make the light super dim, you can be in a specific outfit or in a specific position that’s more flattering. 

“I have learned that looking at myself and watching myself feel pleasure has been an extreme help in loving myself and accepting myself, and feeling empowered and comfortable.”

“I should have a Ph.D. in masturbation,” the musician reportedly claimed.

At this year’s Coachella, Billie teased some of Hit Me Hard and Soft’s upcoming songs, including Lunch, in which sexual nature was discussed.

Billie Eilish discussed how controlling her environment during self-pleasure helped her develop self-love and empowerment

“That song was actually part of what helped me become who I am, to be real,” the California native explained. 

She continued: “I wrote some of it before even doing anything with a girl and then wrote the rest after. 

“I’ve been in love with girls for my whole life, but I just didn’t understand — until, last year, I realized I wanted my face in a vagina. 

“I was never planning on talking about my sexuality ever, in a million years. 

“It’s really frustrating to me that it came up.”

Back In December, Billie was asked during her appearance on the red carpet at Variety’s Hitmakers event about viral comments she had made alluding to her sexual orientation during an interview for Variety the previous month.

In the November profile in Variety, Billie spoke about her feelings for women and declared: “I’m physically attracted to them.”

And, in December, an interviewer asked the singer on the red carpet event: “We gotta talk about your cover story because you mentioned that you felt like, for a long time, women didn’t like you. 

“And when that came out, all the women were like, ‘No, we love her!’ How did that reception feel?”

As she nervously giggled along with the reporter, Billie replied: “I’m still scared of them, but I think they’re pretty.”

The interviewer went on to ask: “Billie, did you mean to come out in that story?” to which the Ocean Eyes hitmaker quipped: “Girl, no, I didn’t, but I kinda thought, ‘Wasn’t it obvious?’ I didn’t realize people didn’t know.”

Billie discussed her attraction to women in a November Variety profile and addressed speculation about her sexual orientation

Image credits: DailyLoud

She continued: “I just don’t really believe in it.

“I’m just like, ‘Why can’t we just exist?’

“I’ve been doing this for a long time, and I just didn’t talk about it. Whoops.

“But I saw the article, and I was like, ‘Oh, I guess I came out today!’

“It’s exciting to me because I guess people didn’t know, but it’s cool that they know.”

Billie followed her answer by admitting that she was “nervous talking about” the subject on the red carpet, adding: “I am for the girls.”

Image credits: billieeilish

The singer later slammed Variety on Instagram, accusing the outlet of “outing” her, writing: “Thanks Variety for my award and for also outing me on a red carpet at 11 am instead of talking about anything else that matters.

“I like boys and girls leave me alone about it please literally who cares stream ‘what was I made for.’”

With hindsight, the Grammy-award-winning artist admitted to Rolling Stone: “The whole world suddenly decided who I was, and I didn’t get to say anything or control any of it. 

“Nobody should be pressured into being one thing or the other, and I think that there’s a lot of wanting labels all over the place. 

“Dude, I’ve known people that don’t know their sexuality, or feel comfortable with it, until they’re in their forties, fifties, sixties. 

“It takes a while to find yourself, and I think it’s really unfair, the way that the internet bullies you into talking about who you are and what you are.”

Billie admitted that it took a long time to understand her sexual identity

Image credits: billieeilish

Billie went on to clarify that she knew that “everybody” speculated about her sexual orientation and that she “liked” the Variety journalist she had spoken to, but she had felt exploited.

If the singer had the opportunity to do it over again on the red carpet, she wouldn’t have answered the question, Rolling Stone reported. 

Nevertheless, the music star acknowledged it could have been worse, admitting: “I’m lucky enough to be in a time when I’m able to say something like that and things go OK for me. 

“And that’s not how a lot of people’s experience is.”

In the highly anticipated Hit Me Hard and Soft, Billie reportedly immersed herself “back into darkness,” combined with experimenting with new sounds, from a string quartet to glittery dance-floor trance.

The album’s title derives from a conversation Billie had with her brother, Finneas, when she mistakenly thought the name of a synth in Logic Pro was called Hit Me Hard and Soft. 

The musician told Rolling Stone: “I thought it was such a perfect encapsulation of what this album does.

“It’s an impossible request: You can’t be hit hard and soft. 

“You can’t do anything hard and soft at the same time. 

“I’m a pretty extremist person, and I really like when things are really intense physically, but I also love when things are very tender and sweet. 

“I want two things at once. So I thought that was a really good way to describe me, and I love that it’s not possible.”

“She’s comfortable with her sexuality,” a reader commented

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