A Belfast mum has opened up about the warning signs of anxiety she noticed in her six-year-old daughter.
Ruth Carson says at first she never considered the possibility that her daughter Isabella could be suffering from anxiety but soon the signs began to confirm her fears.
She told Belfast Live : "I had noticed that she could be overly emotional at times. She wasn’t emotionally resilient, was overly sensitive, and seemingly small things could lead to significant upset.
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"She was also hiding behind hair, twirling and playing with it a lot. She was 5 when I first noticed it all together and had done a little research on the traits collectively. I then reached out to my daughter’s school and my doctor for advice and support."
Isabella was diagnosed with an anxiety-related condition in October 2021. They were referred by the GP to receive support but were told the waiting lists were even longer since COVID so would have to manage themselves in the meantime.
Ruth explained: "At first, anxiety was the last thing I thought of. I still struggle with the idea that a 5-year-old can have anxiety. Especially a child that seemingly has an ‘easy breezy’ childhood with very little to cause worry.
"We don’t yet have a formal diagnosis as such. It all started with me ringing the GP, listing the symptoms and giving him the little bit of information I had gleaned when researching.
"He agreed with my understanding of it all. He made a referral as it wasn’t his area of expertise and we are still waiting to be seen by specialists.
"Seven months later and we are still waiting and I’ve been told 'yes the system is broken, but it’s the only system we’ve got'."
With no formal help available at present for her daughter, the primary school teacher decided to research other methods to help Isabella cope when she became overly anxious.
"I have a specialism in Early Years and play-based learning, so I delved into research and my own resources. I wanted to see how I could help Isabella in the meantime to develop some coping strategies.
"Play is already a massive part of our time together so looking at more therapeutic, calming play thankfully wasn’t strange to her. We colour mandala patterns, do sensory activities like crushing cornflakes and dying rice, or water play.
"She loves blowing bubbles, popping bubble wrap or playing with dough. Getting outdoors and collecting a nature rainbow or making nature kebabs are other favourites; fresh air really helps.
"Sensory play is definitely calming and should be a part of every child’s experience whether in an educational setting or at home. Although, as wonderful a stepping stone as it is for helping children regulate themselves emotionally, it’s not enough by itself to tackle anxiety.
"Through research and counselling I was going through myself I learnt the physiological importance of breath work and that being mindful of our emotions helps release feelings of anxiety.
"I tried to adapt this as part of our playtime to make it child-friendly but I was very conscious that this wasn’t an area I had been trained in."
Seeking out more help online, Ruth discovered a new mindfulness app called Stix Mindfulness.
"I have a play account on Instagram where I keep a record of all the play we do. As a result, I follow a lot of small businesses and play-based accounts. With all the research I’d been doing, I came across Stix Mindfulness.
"It was clear from their profile that they were something that might suit my daughter’s needs. I knew a lot of research and insight would’ve gone into developing the device which helped me see their value and potential."
Comprising of two interactive remotes, one held in each hand, the device talks and guides the child through mindful activities in balance, focus and breathing.
Stix monitors their movements and gives visual, haptic and auditory feedback to keep them focused and engaged. It’s companion app encourages practice and improves skills through unlocking rewards.
Ruth continued: "Through conversations with the owner Liam, we became Stix testers and I’m so glad we did! I immediately liked the independence that Stix gave to her.
"She used them as and when she needed, and she wasn’t reliant on an adult helping her. However, she also loves that the activities were guided, so she didn’t have to rely on her memory.
"They really do account for every type of learner, whether, auditory, visual or kinaesthetic. They are extremely easy to use and very child-friendly. "
The 33-year-old said after just a few weeks of using the app she could see an improvement in how Isabella manged her anxiety.
"The breathing activities help Isabella calm herself if she’s feeling worried. The balance programmes helps her refocus or distract her from her anxiety. If she’s struggling to concentrate on homework for example, she takes a few minutes out to refocus.
"She’s become much more aware of her own feelings and those of others - she sometimes even offers Stix to me if she sees me getting ‘overwhelming feelings’.
"They’ve really helped her develop emotional awareness. When she notices any sort of overwhelming feeling coming over her, it’s empowering for her to know she can do something to change it, and that’s a tool every child should be given.
"So for us, it’s not just about mindfulness; it’s learning emotional literacy, empathy and coping strategies."
With experts predicting a huge rise in young children with mental health related conditions as a result of the pandemic, Ruth has urged anyone who finds themselves in a similar situation to reach out despite the long waiting lists.
She said: "It’s important to try to give our children the support they need, regardless of wait times and lack of medical support. As parents, we have to do all we can.
"So firstly, I’d say knowledge is power. Research sensory play ideas, play therapy, and children’s emotional well-being stories/resources. Play is an exceptionally important tool in any child’s life and it definitely calms an anxious child. It doesn’t have to be complicated, but it’s a wide field.
"So, if you feel out of your depth, talk to your child’s teacher, SENCo or Principal. They’ll be well equipped with great tips and if they aren’t sure, they’ll certainly be able to find out.
"Play accounts on Instagram have been a great inspiration to me. The play community are a friendly bunch and we are always keep to share our knowledge and help any way we can.
"I’d also recommend networking and talking about it with friends and family. Perhaps you’ll unknowingly have people close to you who will know how to help, whether that be professionally or practically.
"Petition local councillors or politicians to help you be seen and heard. They may also be aware of free services in your local area that you could avail of to get support sooner.
"With mental health, as with anything, early intervention is key. Don’t stop trying to get your child the medical and emotional support they need and deserve."
Kelly Walker, CEO Youth Resilience, UK, has been piloting Stix with schools and has seen real positive results in just a month.
She said: “Stix is a genius little gadget that makes mindfulness fun and engaging. We love using Stix in our group interventions for friendship issues, wellbeing and self-esteem or in our one-to-one sessions to build resilience and confidence in their ability to resolve things themselves.
“We’ve seen children prompting one another to use activities such as the ‘Breathing Balloon’ to help calm them outside our Stix sessions.”
Stix launched its Kickstarter campaign #mindfulnessmadefun on 12 th April to raise at least £10,000 to begin manufacturing, so it’s available in time for Christmas.
You can find out more on their website.
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