You’ve got to hand it to the reliably prolific pain-content generator that is Manchester United. Even at the end of a performance that was, if nothing else, a perfect example of empty and bloodless systems football, 90 minutes that felt like watching a robot with a cold go for a walk, this thing can still offer you stories, mini-arcs, narrative Easter eggs.
The only shame is we will have to wait another six months, April at Stamford Bridge, to see if Bruno Fernandes can complete the perfect hat-trick of weirdly missed west London penalties.
