We all know the good old tale about how beneficial travel is. And it is, we don’t argue with that fact. At the same time, that doesn’t mean that it can’t make people anxious.
Like this mom, who got a proposition to let her 16-year-old twins go on a flight overseas alone. It wouldn’t be for no reason; they would be meeting their father at the other end. Yet, the woman can’t help but feel anxious about letting her teenagers fly alone, no matter how well-planned everything is.
More info: Mumsnet
Should a parent allow teenagers to fly overseas alone?
Image credits: Timur Weber (not the actual photo)
A woman’s ex-husband offered to have their two children fly to him in the United States from the United Kingdom
Image credits: Maxwell Pels (not the actual photo)
The kids are 16-year-old twins, so according to airline rules, it’s legal to let them travel alone
Image credits: benzoix (not the actual photo)
But the woman had a hard time imagining her kids going on such an adventure without her
Image credits: yanalya (not the actual photo)
She was worried that they wouldn’t be able to handle something that might come up, for example during the airport check-in process
Image credits: fabrikasimf (not the actual photo)
Her ex-husband told her she was limiting her kids’ growth, but it didn’t help her to shake off her fears
She asked online whether not letting her children on this flight would make her unreasonable
This story’s protagonist is a woman who once was married to a man from the United States. They had kids together who recently turned 16. Unfortunately, the couple is no longer together. Now, the man lives in his home country, while the woman and their twins live in the United Kingdom.
The main issue of this story arose when the OP’s ex-husband decided that he wanted to celebrate his birthday with his kids. To be more specific, he wants the twins to come to the US for about 8 days. He even already has a whole itinerary for each day. But here’s the problem: The man wants the 16-year-olds to travel alone from London to JFK – the airport in New York.
The age of a child that can fly alone depends on the airline. But generally, with some airlines, kids between the ages of 5 and 12 can be assigned a chaperone if the company provides such a service, or they can fly with a responsible adult. Then, minors of 16 years old or older usually can fly alone.
So, technically, there isn’t an issue with the twins flying overseas alone. Well, with the airline. There’s an issue with their mother. She doesn’t want to let them go on such a difficult trip by themselves. After all, the flight overseas isn’t short, and there’s also the process of getting through the airport. She thinks it might be too stressful of an activity for them or that they won’t be able to deal with it.
At the same time, she worries about ruining their lives with her anxiety. In the updates provided in the comments, she mentioned that she hates flying, despite doing it pretty often. A fear of flying is one of the most common forms of travel anxiety. This agitation can be triggered by things like air turbulence, uneasy takeoffs, fear of crashing, and many others.
So, it’s normal for a mom to worry that she’s ruining her kids’ lives because she struggles with something mentally. It is proven that traveling while being young has many benefits. It helps a person to broaden their worldview and strengthen their intercultural skills. It also boosts confidence and drives personal growth.
Image credits: Ross Parmly (not the actual photo)
In fact, a best friend of one of the twins has traveled with another friend alone. So, it isn’t an unprecedented experience in the OP’s environment. Yet, she just can’t imagine letting her kids do that.
Her ex-husband feels the opposite. He even said that she is ‘restricting their growth.’ Back in the day, he traveled a lot himself and didn’t see this as an overly scary thing. So, the woman came onto the Mumsnet forum to ask whether it’s unreasonable not to let her kids travel alone.
There, people unanimously told her to let them go. As one person pointed out, allowing two 16-year-olds, who have traveled before, to take a direct flight where they’ll be met by their dad on the other side is completely OK. After all, the twins want to do that, and they trust themselves that they’ll be able to do it.
The response was so united that the OP addressed it herself in the comments. She pointed out that many parents saying the same thing likely can’t be wrong, which makes her wrong here. Well, at least she can admit she isn’t right. Yet, knowing her state with anxiety, it is likely not going to calm her down fully. After all, anxiety’s definition itself says that it is an excessive type of worrying.
But maybe this will work for her as a motivation to work on her travel-related fears. It’s starting to affect her life, and even more, her relationships. If she decides to let her sons on this adventure, perhaps, in a way, it’ll be like a step of worrying about it less in the future. After all, her kids don’t seem like the type who will give up traveling after turning 18.
Would you let your 16-year-old kids on an overseas flight alone? Share with us in the comments!