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Lifestyle
Victor Billot

An Ode for .. Gore

Gore Mayor Ben Bell. Photo: Supplied

Bard Billot on Caesar Ben  

Gore and Peace

The Young Caesar, Ben, claimed victory in battle

And returned to Gore covered in glory.

Those were the days when Men were as Gods!

But when Ben arrived the temples and bazaars of Gore

were empty, and the wind moaned through the cobwebs.

“Where are my countrymen and subjects?,” he demanded

Of High Chancellor Parrius the Wise.

“They failed to meet key performance outcomes,” replied Parrius.

“All of them?”

“That information is classified under nine thousand pages

of Non Disclosure Agreements,” advised Parrius.

Caesar Ben gathered his forces in the north eastern reaches

of the Copper Kettle tearooms.

He sat with his allies: three cheese rolls,

fifteen packets of sugar, and four paper napkins.

Across the expanse of carpet huddled the rebellious Senators,

in the gloom cast by the long shadow of Parrius.

Caesar Ben inhaled the wholesome aroma

of his three cheese rolls and stirred an extra packet

of sugar into his tea: for these were extraordinary times.

Caesar Ben heard a ping and checked his Council approved smartphone.

Lo, the Senators demandeth his abdication!

Caesar Ben glared back at their distant table and tapped furiously in reply.

The Senators read his missive, then sucked on their hot tea in rage.

In the kitchen, the cook ordered in nine dozen cheese rolls,

For this looked like the beginning of a very long civil war.  

Victor Billot has previously felt moved to write Odes for such luminaries as King Charles III, Tova O'Brien, Christopher Luxon, and Mike Hosking.

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