Yoga is a mindfulness practice that’s supposed to keep you centered and locked into the present moment. It should never cause stress and tension, but this story begs to differ.
A homeowner lives next door to a yoga teacher who holds her classes in her backyard. However, she completely disregarded boundaries and space, continuing her weekend activities even if they spilled onto her neighbor’s lawn.
The worst part was she acted entitled when the homeowner politely called her out for her intrusion. Read the entire story below.
Yoga classes should be a source of calmness and relaxation, not stress and tension
Image credits: katemangostar / freepik (not the actual photo)
This homeowner got more of the latter from their neighbor’s backyard yoga sessions
Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)
The author tried to politely remind the woman about their boundaries, to no avail
Image credits: Classic-Region-9240
People may disrespect your boundaries because they don’t think you have the right to set them
Image credits: stefamerpik / freepik (not the actual photo)
Based on the author’s story, their neighbor blatantly disrespected their boundaries and held yoga classes that spilled onto their lawn. But as far as the neighbor was concerned, she did not feel like she was doing anything wrong because it was “one big green space,” after all.
She may have felt the homeowner didn’t have the right to set those limits, which is one common reason people disrespect boundaries. This is according to author Steph Sterner, who also focuses on setting boundaries in relationships.
In her article for Medium, Sterner points out that such behavior is expected among people who believe they are entitled to special treatment. These are the same actions the yoga teacher supposedly showed toward the author, whose polite requests had been ignored.
Sterner admits that it may seem easier to give in and keep the peace. However, she discourages it, as it may only enable people to show more disrespect in the future.
“A pushy co-worker might expect you to write up the meeting minutes because you’re ‘so good at that kind of thing,’” Sterner wrote. “Before you know it, you’ll become the official minute-taker at work.”
Some people may also show a lack of respect because they simply prioritize getting what they want. Even if they know better, they will cross the line, regardless of your relationship with them.
The woman’s disregard for the author’s space seemed to have also stemmed from this mindset. She even accused her neighbor of being “too territorial,” which they had the right to be, given that the yoga classes were becoming intrusive.
There are active and passive approaches to dealing with someone who disrespects your boundaries
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In cases like this story, the author can take a passive or active approach to dealing with their neighbor’s disrespect and sense of entitlement.
A passive approach involves recognizing that other people’s actions are beyond your control. As NYC-based therapist Kate O’Brien, LCAT, wrote in an article for her website, expressing feedback and concerns is as far as you can go. How the other person responds to it is completely up to them.
Self-assessment is another passive approach. O’Brien recommends checking in with yourself to see how flexible your boundaries are. Are they non-negotiable? Or are you open to some changes if they will work for the situation?
Meanwhile, setting limits and consequences is a more active approach. As O’Brien points out, you should be clear and vocal about these repercussions. Part of setting these limits is walking away from the situation.
The author appeared to have shown enough understanding toward their neighbor and claimed to have politely spoken to her, to no avail. They can take further action, such as escalating the matter to the homeowners association, especially if the yoga classes are becoming disruptive.
What do you think? What should be the author’s next move?
Commenters offered their suggestions, a few of which involved some petty revenge
