An 18-year-old has gone ham on two journos after allegedly robbing a Gold Coast servo with a machete. A Victorian child would well and truly cark it on the spot if they ever read that sentence.
The teenager was heading into Southport police station on Saturday when journalists from 7News and 9News asked him about the alleged robbery.
An 18-year old is accused of robbing a Gold Coast service station at knife-point.
The young man allegedly demanded money from a shop attendant while armed with a machete.
“I didn’t fucking rob the store, get out of my fucking face,”he said.
“Fuck you 7News, fuck you 9News.”
Once again, as a wise, once said: “Oh my goodness, oh my dayum, oh my goodness, they’re goin’ ham”.
As the teenager walked out of the police station one of the journos asked: “Are you coming back for round two?” and by Jove, he most certainly was.
“Round two, let’s go. Give me the mic,” he said.
“Nah, nah, nah. I didn’t rob that store so you guys can go jam it up your ass.”
It must be stated that the journalists did not, in fact, give him their microphones. However, one of them asked the teenager if he was “on anything now” which was… a choice.
They also asked him if he remembered anything from the night before.
“Yes, I remember everything. Walking home and then I get arrested for some bullshit I didn’t do,” he said.
“Bro… why would I go rob a store and then walk through the park and walk back to the place I just robbed?”
walked so this bloke could run. We’ve come full circle.
But then the teenager started verging into unchartered banter territory. That’s right: he started dropping “your mum” zingers.
“How was your night in the watchhouse?” the 9News journo asked.
“Oh yeah, pretty good,” the teenager replied.
“Your mum came around and she came and visited me and I had a pretty good time, to be honest.”
He then said he was going to see said mum again, as well as the 7News journo’s sister.
“I don’t have a sister,” the bamboozled journo said.
“Oh sorry but you will in nine months, won’t you?” the teenager replied.
Everyone then stared at each other in a very kind of way. It was giving Michael Bluth whenever George Michael mentioned his girlfriend Ann Veal.
The vid concluded with the teenager honking on a vape and saying he DGAF he was banned from coming within 50 metres of the service station.
“Good, it’s a shit servo anyway,” he said.
Brave words.
Per , the teenager allegedly walked into a servo on Government Road armed with a machete and demanded money from a 48-year-old shop attendant.
She placed the till on the counter and the teenager then allegedly stole the money and fled, before police found him in a nearby park.
He was charged with armed robbery and drug possession after police allegedly found Xanax on him.
Will the teenager’s backwards Gucci cap soon become as iconic as Worthington’s ? Only time will tell.
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