BLUE IS THE COLOUR
Chelsea became champions of the world this time last month. If you didn’t know any better, you’d assume everyone has been basking in the glow of this epochal achievement ever since. But you do know better. You know that Kepa ended up looking quite the toolkit in the League Cup final. Again. You know that the team flirted with FA Cup humiliation at the hands of Luton. And you know that, geopolitical events having led to Roman Abramovich putting the club up for sale, an unprecedented era of success is coming to an end. Chelsea are still champions of the world for the next 11 months, of course, and whatever happens now will always have a roll of honour stretching halfway down the Kings Rahd. So, small violins and all that. Still, everything in context.
No, it’s been downhill ever since they lifted that damned Fifa pot, and if all the aforementioned wasn’t bad enough, events this morning threw a cat into a tin full of pigeons, then firmly closed the lid. Abramovich has been hit with sanctions by the UK government and had his assets frozen, plunging Chelsea into chaos. Of course, this pales into insignificance when compared to events in Ukraine, but our old pal context helps us here again – and to be fair, people are allowed to be worried about different stuff of varying importance at the same time. This decision – preposterously trumpeted on social media by the Oligarch Taskforce, the UK government seemingly now being advised by Trey Parker and Matt Stone – means Abramovich’s plans to sell the club have come to an abrupt halt.
Given rumours that he may have sold up to the bloke running the New York Jets, this may be no bad thing for Chelsea in the long run. At least everyone has time to stop and think. But little else about the situation is ideal, with the club now operating under terms of a special licence that allows them to keep going despite the asset freeze. For example, the club are allowed to pay their staff and fulfil their fixtures: tonight’s game at Norwich, scheduled to kick off at 7.30pm with Thomas Tuchel losing his rag in interviews at 7.15pm and 9.45pm, is still on. But next week’s Big Cup tie in Lille, for example, is momentarily up in the air, given the club are now only allowed to spend £20,000 per game on travel. Shipping a world-class squad plus staff and all their gear around the globe is twice as expensive as it sounds.
The club will be subject to a transfer ban (again) and won’t be allowed to offer anything to Antonio Rudiger, Andreas Christensen or Dave, all of whom are out of contract at the end of the season. The club’s sponsorship with Three has been suspended, while the Stamford Bridge hotel is no longer allowed to take bookings. If nothing else, that reduces the possibility of the politically-minded reserving a room with a view to a dirty protest. Perhaps worst of all, Chelsea are no longer able to sell a single thing, from players to match tickets and other general tat. And so all of those Champions of the World T-shirts (navy/white, £20) will remain piled up symbolically behind the shutters of the club megastore, gathering dust for an as-yet-unspecified period of time. If that doesn’t convince you that last month’s Fifa victory was cursed, nothing will.
LIVE ON BIG WEBSITE
Join Scott Murray for hot Big Vase last 16, first leg action from Sevilla 2-1 West Ham (5.45pm, all times GMT) – and then keep it locked for Barry Glendenning’s big, er, Thursday night Big Vase-Premier League clockwatch, featuring Rangers 2-0 Red Star, Barcelona 4-2 Galatasaray, Norwich 0-2 Chelsea* and more.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
“When I first started playing, I was the only [girl] in the whole school. Now, you see a whole team coming out, prepared and ready, wanting to learn and have fun with it. It’s great to see” – the former Arsenal and England forward Kelly Smith, who took part in a schools initiative that saw more than 90,000 girls play football on Wednesday.
RECOMMENDED LISTENING
Football Weekly Extra is here! Join the podders as they react to the developing Chelsea situation and chew over the latest Big Cup drama.
FIVER LETTERS
“After today’s announcement, can we look forward to a London derby of Taxpayers FC v HM Government?” – Peter Arnold.
“If Holly Valance’s husband is successful in buying Chelsea [Wednesday’s Fiver], maybe they can get Home and Away’s Ailsa to manage them” – Mark in Singapore.
“It says a lot about the situation at Chelsea that Andreas Christensen’s proposed Doing One to Barcelona will see him end up at a club with a rosier future” – Jim Hearson.
“Reading the stories of linos and refs at Under-11 games drew me back to this wonderful thread describing the influence top tier football has had on the youth” – Philip Robertson.
“If you think the placing of the ball for a corner kick is a problem, be grateful you don’t have to watch a match in a stadium where corner kicks are sponsored. Taking in a match in the USA! USA!! USA!!! I found every ‘corner restart’ was sponsored by a major pharmacy chain; the kick being preceded by a jingle that informed the crowd that the chain was at the ‘corner of health and happiness.’ The biggest cheer of the game occurred when a player managed to take the corner before the guy in the booth could re-cue the jingle” – John Lawton.
Send your letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. And you can always tweet The Fiver via @guardian_sport. Today’s winner of our prizeless letter o’ the day is … John Lawton.
NEWS, BITS AND BOBS
Pep Guardiola has expressed sympathy for Chelsea’s players and manager amid their ongoing off-field turmoil. “It’s a difficult position,” the Manchester City manager Pepped. “It’s uncomfortable and I feel sorry for them because they are there to do [their] jobs as well as possible.”
Vivianne Miedema and Paulo Dybala are backing Common Goal’s emergency Ukraine response – and you can too, via this link.
Tommy T doesn’t think Andreas Christensen should leave Chelsea, informing him “you can fulfil any dream here”. Mind you, that was yesterday.
David Moyes has tapped into his vast European knowhow, to prepare West Ham for a trip to Sevilla and a mighty Big Vase tussle.
Brighton head coach and managerial mod Graham Potter can’t wait for a good old tear-up on the south coast this weekend, with Liverpool visiting the Amex. “I always like playing against Liverpool because they’re one of the best,” tooted Potter from a passing Vespa.
And the Republic O’Ireland manager Stephen Kenny is targeting a place at Euro 2024 after signing a contract extension. “That’s the big dream for Ireland and no stone will be left unturned attempting to do that,” Kenny cheered.
STILL WANT MORE?
Amazingly, Sheffield United’s Rhys Norrington-Davies saw a better future for himself than strawpedoing alcopops on sticky dancefloors, and binned university to become a footballer. He gets his chat on with Ben Fisher.
In events that amused absolutely no one, Paris Saint-Germain and Mauricio Pochettino folded under the merest application of pressure, yet again. Barney Ronay shares some thoughts on the matter.
“Suddenly Madrid knew and PSG knew” – Sid Lowe reflects on a wild night at the Bernabéu. And look in their face, look in their soul, PSG looked stupefied, growls Adam White.
Domènec Torrent, previously Pep Guardiola’s assistant at Barça, Bayern and Manchester City, is returning to Camp Nou as manager of Galatasaray. He gets his chat on with Will Unwin.
The USWNT are, at long last, being paid the same as the USMNT. But some people believe both are taking money away from the grassroots. Beau Dure has more.
And if it’s your thing … you can follow Big Website on Big Social FaceSpace. And INSTACHAT, TOO!
