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Daily Mirror
Daily Mirror
World
Jade Culver

Woman with husband, boyfriend and a girlfriend ignores trolls as she has 'a lot of love'

A married woman says she's in a relationship with three different people - as she has "a whole lot of love to spare".

Anna, 26, who doesn't want her surname published, often finds herself kicking husband Jake, 25, out of bed to spend quality time with her boyfriend.

Both Anna and her husband often find themselves out on dates - not with each other, but with their boyfriends.

The costume design student had been with Jake for four years before meeting her boyfriend Spencer, 28, and most recently her girlfriend Ellie, 26.

Anna, based in Chicago, Illinois, US, has three separate romantic relationships, with her partners all in a relationship with her but also having the freedom to pursue other romantic conquests.

Anna said: "I've been with Jake for nine years and married for the last four.

She says she is still deeply in love with husband Jake (Blessed Bee Photography / MERCURY PRESS)

"We were at a point in life where marriage seemed like the best course of action for financial and dependency reasons. We are still very much in love, but, I have a whole lot of love to spare for other people as well.

"Whilst not everyone is just in a relationship with each other, we are all extremely good friends and have a 'kitchen table' style polycule relationship where we all get along and vibe with each other.

"I live with Jake full time, but Ellie and Spencer live in different states, and everyone has full time jobs so it's always quite hard to schedule separate time for each individual.

"I would love for us all to be able to live together at some point, but that's not really a viable option right now as everyone is on their own path in life."

Date nights between Anna and her individual partners are usually scheduled months in advance, and when it comes to staying in the same bed, that's really up to everyone involved.

The group describe themselves as a polycule (@sailorstarandthestarboys / MERCURY PRESS)
Spencer, Anna and Jake, who say they do not experience jealousy (@sailorstarandthestarboys / MERCURY PRESS)

Anna said: "When Spencer comes over, Jake tends to go and sleep on the couch.

"He gets pretty claustrophobic and likes to give Spencer and I space when we get the chance to see each other."

Spencer said: "Jake also snores. But he's a big cuddler as well, so it's nice to chill with him as a friend and get a hug from him every now and then."

Jake added: "Mine and Anna's love is pretty grounded, and I've had my own personal experiences being in a relationship with more than one person.

""Polyamory is different, it doesn't work unless you make a point to understand the your partner's feelings and help them love who, and how they want to." "

Despite being in three different relationships, Anna finds that there is very rarely any jealousy between her partners and that everyone gets along very well.

She said: "There's never any jealousy in the relationship, we always make sure that communication is a big part of our everyday life.

Anna has spoken about her experience having three partners (Blessed Bee Photography / MERCURY PRESS)

"Polyamory really makes you look into your own feelings and where those feelings come from, it definitely puts a focus on dealing with things in a healthy way.

"You can discuss these feelings with a group of people that love you and support you, rather than dumping all of these feelings on a singular person.

"I feel like monogamous relationships carry quite heavy burdens when it comes to carrying your partners feelings and emotions."

Anna's 'polycule' defies the stereotypical 'triad' relationship; rather than being composed of three partners who are all romantically involved with each other, Anna's partners are platonic with each other and able to pursue their own separate romantic interests.

A 'polycule' is a group of people connected through their inter-connecting non-monogamous relationships, where each person may have more than one partner to themselves.

With such a unique relationship, Anna and her partners are no strangers to backlash and trolls, and often try to educate people via social media.

Anna said: "We get trolled and a lot of abuse in our DMS on the TikTok account where I share our day-to-day relationship quite often.

"Some big far-right figures actually picked up on one of our videos recently like Ben Shapiro, and we were just inundated with lots of hateful comments.

"In order to tackle the hate and misinformation which trolls spread, I've actually started to do videos where I respond to hateful comments and rate them on a scale of one to ten.

"It's a fun way to tackle the hate, whilst also being informative to people interested or confused by polyamorous relationships."

Ellie added: "I'm the happiest when I know less about the hateful comments really."

Jake said: "You cannot convince me that people who hate on us are older than 12, and I do not care what some random child thinks. Grow up and speak to me like an adult."

Despite the backlash they've received, the polycule are thriving, and have the full support from their family and friends.

Anna said: "All our parents have been really supportive, although they were quite unsure of it all at first, especially the logistics of it all.

"But they can see how happy we are, and how we all support each other."

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