The median age for marriage in the US is approximately 30.5 years for men and 28.6 years for women. So it’s no surprise that when Reddit user Kimberlyn008 and her friends were finishing up their twenties, the group found themselves in the midst of wedding season, a time filled with joy, love, and—of course—a bit of drama. In a post on r/CharlotteDobreYouTube, the woman revealed that everything culminated after one of the brides arrived at another one’s ceremony wearing a white dress—a major no no in wedding etiquette.
A woman showed up at her friend’s wedding with this dress
Image credits: R.Vivimos / amazon (not the actual photo)
And the bride had a big problem with it
Image credits: Kayla Renee / pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Stephanie Lima / pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: kimberlyn008
Generally, it’s inappropriate for guests to wear white to a wedding
“The tradition of the white wedding dress began when Queen Victoria married Prince Albert in 1840,” says Kimberly Lehman, wedding and event planner at Love, Laughter & Elegance. “Victoria selected a white satin gown lavishly embellished with lace that was handcrafted in England. After the photographs of the wedding were widely published, brides began copying Victoria’s style by wearing white gowns to their own nuptials.”
When you’re a guest at a wedding, the most important thing to keep in mind is not to upset the bride. So it’s safe to assume that you have to stay away from any outfits that are predominantly white, cream, or ivory.
Furthermore, this rule isn’t exclusive to women. “Unless specified in the invitation, men should also avoid wearing white to a wedding,” fashion editor Lauren Whalley explains. “If you want to wear a lighter option, try colors like tan, khaki, or even a light grey.”
However, if we’re only talking about a white button-up shirt underneath your suit or tuxedo jacket, that’s completely acceptable. But think of it this way: if you’re questioning whether an outfit looks a little too white, it probably is. Many popular brands (like Anthropologie, Reformation, and Lulus) take the guessing game out of shopping by offering curated wedding guest collections. By using these lists, you can discover wedding-worthy outfits that don’t conflict with traditional etiquette. Or, if you don’t want to purchase the outfit, rental sites like Nuuly, Rent the Runway, and The Black Tux offer a wide selection you can get for a few days. Before you choose a new wedding outfit, it’s a good idea to poll a few friends to see what they think of the look (and the color).
But from what we can gather, it sounds like Taylor wasn’t interested in any of that and didn’t care about making a scene.
“In general, it’s best to stay away from any clothing that can be photographed as white or appear that way in person,” adds Whalley. “If the couple does request guests wear a neutral color palette, look for a medium-tone beige or champagne.”
You can get away with a knee-length gown that includes white elements as part of a larger pattern. “A colorful, cocktail-length dress with a white lace overlay is acceptable,” explains Lehman. “A casual sheath dress also works well, but if the dress is white and floor-length or full-skirted, it won’t work.”
And when the author of the post uploaded a picture of the dress in question, at least to my untrained eye, it did look very white. Plus, the fact that Taylor was very angry at Sarah when she showed up to her wedding in the same dress kind of proves that it was a malicious choice.
Image credits: Pavel Danilyuk / pexels (not the actual photo)
As the story gained popularity, its author joined the discussion in the comments
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