When Maja Proescholdt's divorce was finalised she knew she wanted to mark her new-found freedom. So she held her very own divorce party where she invited friends, ate cake, decorated her home with banners and got glammed up in a sash and tiara.
The 30-year-old was with her former partner for six-and-a-half years and married for over four when they split in 2020. It was when the paperwork was signed and sealed that Maja became one of the increasing number of Brits celebrating the end of their marriage.
In fact, research shows searches for divorce cake, parties, and even rings have seen an increase. And census data now shows around 42% of marriages end in divorce.
For Maja, who is originally from Minneapolis but now lives in York, the party marked the end of a lengthy process that saw her finally divorced two years after her split. So she donned a 'finally divorced' sash and decorated her house with 'finally divorced' and 'bye boy' banners before hitting the town.
Speaking to wedding and engagement ring specialists Jessica Flinn, she said: “I decided to have a divorce party for myself where I invited all my close friends (I'd have invited family too if they weren't all in the US). The party was at my house for cake, before going out for drinks and dancing in town. Hearing the DJ call out 'and let's have it for Maja's Divorce Party' while I was on the revolving dance floor at Popworld was a top life moment.
“My cake was custom-made by a local bakery, who created the divorce cake of my dreams. They sorted all of the details exactly how I wanted, particularly the 'Thank U Next' writing on the cake.
“I created a Divorce Party playlist for music at the party, featuring so many great songs (a lot of Beyonce). One of my friends also gave me an "I'm finally a divorcée" gift basket which included a card that said "congrats on getting divorced” and I loved it. When the divorce was finalised, I definitely wanted to celebrate”
Maja, who says she lives an 'unconventional' lifestyle says she wanted to hold the party to celebrate her freedom. Especially as she went through the divorce process without hiring a solicitor.
She continued: "There were a lot of reasons, but mainly to celebrate my freedom and me. The legal process of getting divorced is complicated and takes a long time.
"I did this myself, without a lawyer and with barely any assistance from my ex, which was an insane amount of administrative work on my part. In hindsight, if I'd known just how difficult it would be, I'd have just paid for a lawyer to sort it. Although we split in October 2020, my divorce wasn't finalised until the end of March 2022.
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“The process dragged on for so long, and towards the end, I often worried that I'd never actually get divorced. This was the last thing tying me to him. So when the divorce was finalized, I definitely wanted to celebrate.
“At that point, my sadness and grief from the loss of my relationship had faded with time, and my overwhelming feeling of getting divorced was one of relief and empowerment. It felt amazing to get together with my friends and celebrate being divorced, being single, and being free. I personally have very strong feelings about celebrating 'unconventional' life choices”
Maja added: “I personally have very strong feelings about celebrating "unconventional" life choices, that are just as meaningful as the traditional life events society tends to deem worthy of a party. I definitely feel like conventional life events, which nearly all revolve around romantic relationships/children (engagements, weddings, pregnancy/child's birthdays) – is what the majority of parties and celebrations revolve around. If you don't tick those boxes, do you just never get to celebrate yourself?
“As someone who had a very unconventional relationship (not just as an international couple/long-distance for several years, but also we eloped and invited no one to our wedding we didn't wear rings, I didn't change my name, etc), and an unconventional lifestyle of moving/living abroad prioritizing travelling, I feel really strongly that we should celebrate all the meaningful life events in our lives.
“Any achievement or accomplishment is worth being celebrated! I'm very proud of being divorced – to me, it shows my strength and resilience, and the fact that I won't settle for being treated as less than I deserve. And I absolutely think that it should be celebrated, just as much as a marriage or any other "traditional" life event should be celebrated.”
