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A woman has expressed her anger after she booked her flight and hotel for a destination wedding, just to learn that she was uninvited to the event.
In a recent post shared to the popular “Wedding Shaming” Reddit forum, the woman shared that her husband’s niece – who she referred to as Jennifer – announced her engagement about 14 months before the wedding was scheduled. The wedding guest then shared some details about the event and the planning she and her husband had to do months before it.
“It was to be a destination wedding, and the guests were advised to make all reservations early, as hotels at the locale would fill up quickly,” she wrote. “So we went ahead and reserved our hotel room, bought plane tickets, etc.”
She explained that “about seven months before the scheduled wedding,” that’s when she and her husband received the “Save The Date” card. The note “reiterated the importance” of booking hotels and flights as soon as possible, which these two wedding guests had already done.
However, one month before the wedding date, the Reddit user learned that the event had actually already happened. She also acknowledged that she and her husband weren’t invited to that specific wedding.
“The father of the bride mentioned, in a VERY offhand manner, that Jennifer had gotten married during the previous weekend, albeit in a new destination and with a very scaled-down number of guests present,” she continued. “Until this point, we had never been apprised of any new developments or changes to the original plans! No card, no email, NOTHING!”
She expressed that because she and her husband learned about the wedding after it happened, “it was too late” to cancel their flight and hotel reservation. As a result, they “were out quite a bit of money.”
According to the Reddit user, she wasn’t upset necessarily about the fact that she was essentially uninvited to the wedding, which happened on a different date then initially planned.
“The thing is, I understand that life happens, and sometimes plans change. In this case, Jennifer and her beau actually had a valid reason (it’s a long story) for doing what they did,” she wrote, while she didn’t specify what that reason was.
However, she was annoyed about the fact that no one told her or her husband that the destination wedding they planned for wasn’t happening.
“But I DON’T understand why we weren’t told about the change in plans before the actual new wedding took place! I think even letting us and the other dis-invited know via a mass email would have been better than NO communication at all,” she concluded. “Breach of etiquette, inconsiderate, and yes, tacky!”
The Reddit post has quickly gone viral, with more than 3,100 upvotes. In the comments, multiple people criticized the bride and groom because they didn’t notify the Reddit user that the wedding plans had been changed.
“That is absurd. They should be compensating their guests. I can’t imagine doing something so incredibly rude and selfish,” one wrote.
“You’re invited to our wedding! Oh, never mind…”
byu/Far_Rhubarb7177 inweddingshaming
“Is it possible the original wedding is still on?? How are they going to explain this to people who show up? I’m so baffled as to how someone can be this rude!” another wrote. “I’d try to get credits instead of a refund and see if I can book a vacation when I would have been at the wedding, then post pics and tag them telling them my vacation is their gift.”
“That was incredibly inconsiderate! Wow. It’s fine that the wedding had to happen sooner; life happens and people are understanding,” a third agreed. “But, telling people more than once that this was the destination/date, and encouraging the booking of airline tickets and accommodations, and not immediately, like, the day it was decided that a particular wedding was not happening, and not sending out an immediate mass email… was dereliction of duty.”
Other people encouraged the Reddit user and her husband to still go on the trip and enjoy it, since the hotel and flights are non-refundable.
“You should go, connect with the other guests who were screwed over, post all the fun you’re having together on social media and don’t once mention the bride, groom or wedding. Just a bunch of people having the time of their lives,” one wrote.
“Since the trip is non-refundable, just go for vacation. It’ll probably be more fun without the wedding BS,” another agreed.