Morning, today we find out who will go through to the men's final - that nice Roger Federer or Tommy Haas and some Brit/Scot/National Hero/massive anticlimax or Andy Roddick.
Elsewhere, it's all about the doubles with the Williams sisters intent on upping their Wimbledon domination in the women's doubles, while the other Murray is in action in the mixed doubles.
While you wait for Barney, why not read all about Andy Murray's exploits here. Or you can find out all the preview action of the Federer v Haas match here.
If it's Williams on Williams action you're after, though, this is the link to click.
11.05am Hello and welcome to a really muggy, damp, sticky, sweaty, moist, dripping, slate-grey Wimbledon.
Yes. It's the big one today.
A man on the verge of making history.
Roger Federer is just two matches away from beating the all-time Grand Slam record.
But can he really do it?
11.10am Federer is first up on centre court. After which it's Andy Murray v Andy Roddick.
Is it just me, or does everybody seem to be taking this one a bit lightly? There seems to be an assumption that Murray's going to breeze this one. He's beaten Roddick 6 times out of eight they've played and one in one on grass. He can "read" the Roddick serve. He's going to dodder Roddick about the court with his teasing slice. He's the coming man.
I'm not totally convinced it's that easy. Murray hasn't so far beaten anyone he shouldn't be beating here this year. Beating Roddick on grass in a semi is a step up. It's breaking new ground. He should be able to do it. But it's still something new.
Plus Roddick isn't dumb. He has a good coach. He beat a - albeit lesser - scurrying back-court schemer in the last round. It's not going to be easy. It might even be really long and draining and much decorated by squawking cut-away shots of assorted self-publicists claiming to be "Miss Scotland" ands thereby getting on the BBC.
11.20am The Guardian's ace news-sleuth Peter Walker writes:
A real scrum this morning for the best spots on Henman Hill, despite the fact they're showing the men's semis on the big screens in Court Two. At 10.30am, when the stewards pulled back the ropes, there was a mass sprint for the picnic tables. It was like a rush for an empty Tube carriage, but with less decorum. The most dedicated Murray fan I've spoken to so far is a London-based Dundee man who queued up from 11.30pm, straight from a night out with friends, with no tent or sleeping bag. He sheltered in the toilet block when it rained and got no sleep.
I only live up the road. It rained a lot last night. Dundee man will be reeking strongly of small blue urinal cube this morning.
11.24am Weather today, for what it's worth: 26C, with a "20% chance" of rain. Moderate westerley breezes. Unless you're sitting anywhere near a rampantly self publicising Miss Scotland. In which case expect powerful jets of warm expelled mucus, regular salt water showers and plenty of hot air.
11.30 Murray stands on the verge of history yodels a publicly-funded website with commercial imperative for claiming Murray stands on the verge of history. Nobody from Britain has got to the men's final for 71 years. Does that really qualify as making "history"? By these standards doesn't everything we ever do qualify as "history"? It's all new you know. Doesn't Andy Roddick also "stand on the verge of history"? and Tommy Haas? And how many years before something becomes "history" anyway? 71? How about 60? Or 20? Will people in future generations look back and say "mmm... That was history you know". Or if he loses, will people 100 years from now say, "I believe Andy Murray that day stood on the verge of history"?
11.40am Why not send in your predictions anyway to barney.ronay@guardian.co.uk. Will Andy Murray "make history" by doing something exceptional beyond the reach of most human beings, or in some way significantly influencing the development of human civilization through his actions. Or will he beat Andy Roddick in a tennis match - and by how much? I think it's going to go to four sets, couple of tie-breaks in there maybe a 7-6, 5-7, 7-6, 6-4. Roddick will suffer a brief bout of cramp in the third set. Murray will celebrate victory by sort of crumpling on the baseline and then standing up and doing a kind of introverted fist-pump. And the Duke of Kent will applaud in a really stilted way with his hands stretched out in front of him like Amanda Holden.
11.45pm By the way, there's also a Williams sisters tag-team act out on Court 1 at 1.00pm. They will be absolutely monstering the No1 seeds Black and Huber, apparently without even really trying.
Also Jamie Murray and Huber will be losing narrowly in three sets to the No9 seeds Knowles and Groenefeld on a court and at a time yet to be decided. After which Murray will go back to the locker room and sellotape a picture of Jelena Jankovic on to one of his old rackets, prop it up at roughly head height, put an old jumper on it and some shoes underneath and then laugh and laugh and laugh and slap it on the buttocks a few times. And then go home and sit around feeling a little bit sad.
12.10pm And spare a thought for Tommy Haas today. Great achievement by him to get this far. This is a man who has spent most of his 20s battling knee-knack, shoulder-gah, groin-hynnng, elbow-rrnnnnff and various other tennis-related entries in the medical dictionary. He plays proper serve and volley tennis too. And he's a nice modest chap too.
I think Haas might even be my secret men's-draw-crush at this year's championships. Never mind your Hewitts and your A-Rods. Haas does it for me. Anyone else out there got a guilty pleasure from this year's championships? And don't just say "Gisela Dulko" or "that one, you know the one, the one with the hair and legs". I'm talking tennis here.
12.40pm David Brown, slightly unnervingly, writes "Good luck with today's blog, we're all right behind you". Thanks.
12.48pm Ben Watson feels like delivering a great-swinging, rib-cracking haymaker to the guts of the BBC: "Do you not find the amount of bizarre and idiosyncratic tennis language used by the BBC commentary team a bit disturbing? I'm referring to terms such as 'A-game' and 'bringing his/her ball' etc. Tells of years spent in a confined environment with little interaction with the normal, outside world."
I'm bringing my C-game today. I had my D-game on yesterday.
12.50pm James Watt has a prediction: "'I'm guessing that it will be a 4 set grinding win from Murray that will result in a trademark "CAAAAAAAAAAHMMMMMOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNN!!" so loud that it will cause his clothes to fall off, Wayne's World style." I don't think his clothes will fall off. I think his head will revolve really quickly several times, making a "boyoing" noise.
By the way, Murry has just strolled in, alone. No bodyguard.
12.52 pm Jason Edwards is a man who knows the cost of everything but the value of nothing. He wears his hat at a rakish angle, affects and ivory cigarette holder and says: "Forget Murray standing on the verge of history, I think he is instead standing on the verge of British Tradition. Come this afternoon he will start well and win the first set before remembering this is a Wimbledon Semi-Final and as a British player it is his duty to fold under the weight of expectation and limply surrender the next three sets to crash out of the tournament."
Nah. Get out.
12.55pm Liz Something [tries to figure out email address/name interaction and gives up] wants to know exactly why Roger Federer never sweats. "Maybe it's the big mother of a sweatband around his forehead? Or other plausible reasons? He's an alien. He's a demigod. Clothes impregnated with anti-perspirant. Or Roger doesn't sweat - he glowsssssssss."
I think he does sweat. But only his feet, really heavily like a small Alpine spring.
12.59pm Alec Cochrane asks: "The radio claimed this morning if Murray wins they are going to invite the Queen along to the final for her first appearance in 30-odd years (sorry, I was still half asleep when they said it, so I can't remember the exact figure). Is this true?"
I think you misheard. If Murray gets to the final they're going to invite power-pop rock Legends Queen along, who haven't been for 30-odd years since they were last here and were ejected after Freddie Mercury wore a vest and really tight white jeans in the royal box and tried to hire a troupe of ballboys to follow him around carrying his special party powder. Queen will come to the final this year, but Bryan May will eventually be forced to sit in one of the gangways to prevent his magnificent bouffant hair from obscuring the view of the Duchess of Kent.
1.04pm By the way I've just been put and about. Still loads of people here. Saw two Americans playing in the boy's singles: big-serving Jordan Cox (who sounds like something you should never type into Google at work) versus Devin Britton (who sounds like he should open the bowling for St Kitts). Liked the look of Jordan. He kept saying "Great shaaart!" when he lost a point. Very sporting.
1.09pm Federer and Haas are knocking up on centre court. It's gloomy out there. Tommy still has his backwards baseball cap on though. No, Tommy, I really think it looks cool too.
1.14pm Haas serves first up. Federer very smooth about the court, takes it to deuce with a lovely composed point, ending with a punched volley. Haas responds well, takes the game with some serve and volley. 1-0 Haas.
And Trevor Sparks is really, really bored at work. And, I'm guessing, his boss isn't in today: "How about using the predictive power of words. I have never once failed using this method of prediction. An anagram of "Murray-Roddick" is Duck dry, or Amir So I am predicting dry weather (for ducks) or a celeb-spot from Amir Khan. On the other-hand, Federer-Haas gives: Deaf Shearer. So the messiah will be in the stands, albeit with an ear-infection." Christ.
1.19pm Federer holds easily to go 1-1, then gets to 0-30 on the Haas serve with two great returns. Haas keeps his nerve and serves deep to take the game. Haas 2-1.
Jack Lee wonders: "Wouldn't it be good if alongside Queen for the final there were progsters King Crimson and purple $ex dwarf* (*may not actually be purple or a dwarf) Prince." And Lady Sovereign. Lord Beginner. And the King of Pop... oh no hang on.
1.21pm Mark Taylor wonders: "Which is your favourite fist based sporting celebration. Is it the '"Come on Tim" second week special anger' fist pump, the Murray 'lost the first four games and acting like its match point' fist pump, or the England batsman 'yeah just scuffed a ball for two runs for the first time in three overs' fist bump." I liked the Henman one where he also waggled his neck like a pigeon at the same time. Just to show he really meant it. That was always very moving.
1.25pm Federer holds his serve to love to go 2-2. He's looking pretty cool out there and really moving well. He kicks off the next game with a an absolute hummer of a pass as Haas rushes in. Haas battles to get to 15-30. Then some more serve and volley - get in there Tommy! And it's 3-2 Haas.
Alex Walker says: "Is it just me or is the coverage for tennis pretty dire? The commentary is always rather droll except McEnroe offending someone. I would rather see a replay of the down-the-line set winner than a close up slow motion of murray's sock, followed by an elbow, then a ball, then a racket. F1, football and rugby all have replays in a second of great shots/over-taking/tackles, but tennis always seems to miss the best bits."
No question cricket and football on Sky at least have bar-raising camera work and direction. But then, they never do anything else.
1.31pm Haas makes Federer fight a bit on his serve for the first time. Gets to 30-30, but Haas loses his rag a bit and seems to waver as R-Fed holds easily in the end. Lovely little disdainfully bunted winner at the net. 3-3 here.
Nick Potter wants to know: "Has Michael Owen called you yet?" Actually, he's coming for a medical later today. We need to find out if he can run downstairs and get some diet Cokes from the free fridge without doing his knee and taking ages and then whinging about it. It's a huge opportunity at this stage in his career.
1.36pm At 3-4 Federer plays the most amazing chipped backspun lob stretching on the baseline to go 15-0 on his serve. That was simply breathtaking. The shot of a tennis god. It's 4-4 in the blink of an eye.
Steve Baldock, who wears a wizard's hat at the weekend and collects "powerful stones", says: "Murray and Federer have no middle names, so they'll both be in the final. Federer is the only player without any double letters in his name, which makes him the obvious title winner. Trust me, nomletterology has a lot of truth in it."
1.41pm Kent strawberries, clotted cream. I'm telling you. It doesn't get much better. Haas is mixing up his serves, with the odd double fault tossed in. But still holds on just about. 5-4 Haas.
Peter Walker has been strolling the grounds here in SW19: "Equal numbers of Swiss flags and Union flags visible on Henman Hill, ie one of each. We're not exactly whipping ourself into a patriotic frenzy ahead of Murray's "historic moment", are we?" Well, I'm already wearing my hand-knitted saltire jester's hat.
1.43pm As predicted right here on this 'blog the Williamses are absolutely beasting The Other Women in the doubles on Court 1. They've just won the first set 6-1. The Other Women are the No1 seeds. Get out of it.
1.46pm It's 5-5 here. No breaks. No real drama yet. Just some fine grass court play from both men.
David Naylor, who weighs 38-stone and has specially made trousers, writes: "To Steve Baldock (1.36pm), I would say that "nomletterology" sounds like the study of how to eat my breakfast while reading the post. Om nom nom
and all that. And yes, I'm American, hence the reference to breakfast
and the automatic connection of everything I read to food."
1.49pm Haas is 5-4 up and he's serving very well. This is going to a tie-break. He's also going out with the woman from 90201, apparently. Which maybe explains the backwards hat.
1.50pm It's 6-6. Tie-break. Stay tuned.
Andrew Lockhart is gabbling incoherently: "Following some heated debate with a certain Kevin Mannerings last time
Haas played (day before yesterday, was it?), I thought it might be of
great interest to know that Tommy (sic) is actually officially listed
under this name with the ATP and the ITF, the two world tennis
authorities. So I hope that ends the discussion as to whether he
legitimately uses his name. And by the way, you don't want to know his
nickname, it's too embarrassing to post here."
Eh? Wha? So what's his real name? And what's his nickname? And it better be good.
1.52pm Federer aces to go 1-1. Then hits a brilliant forehand topspin approach that Haas can only bunt up in the air and into the net on its second bounce. 2-1 Federer. Federer then nets on the backhand after a long-ish rally. 2-2.
1.54pm Mini-break to Federer as Haas hits a backhand narrowly long. 3-2. Haas then wumps another backhand miles out. Lovely deep sliced second serve there from R-Fed. But - wow! Haas chases down an overhead at the net and mishits a great pass down the line on his forehand. Mini-break back. 4-3 Federer.
1.58pm clean serve return backhand winner from Federer to go 5-3 up. Then it's 6-3 in a second and three set points. and Federer wins the first set 7-6 as Haas nets trying to pass him. Not exactly thrilling stuff, but clinical stuff, well-organised stuff, really efficient stuff. Swiss stuff.
2.00pm So all in order for Federer so far, who has just held to love to go 1-0 in the second set. You get the feeling Haas needs a dramatic intervention here of some kind.
S Downie hollers down his wind-up modem: "Being a British tennis fan in Vladivostok is difficult. A 10 hour time difference means no sleep during Wimbledon. There's no hot water in my flat. I'm on the wrong side of my block of flats to get TV, so I'm enjoying Wimbledon through your words. Tantric tennis. I can't wait to tell the grandchildren how it was in my day, watching an auto-refreshing page and boiling water for a wash. BUT I have beer."
2.06pm Federer cruising out there. It's now 2-1 Federer no breaks, but Haas is getting tetchy. "WASS NEIN GOTT HIMMEL BREMEN EFFENBURG WOLFGANG WOLF SCHNELL!!" he shouts.
Hard-core tennis head Mercedes Osma writes: "I'm not very interested in the game, more in the public. Any famous faces?" Well, in the royal box we've got Freddie Windsor. Bjorn Borg. David bleeding Frost. Rod Laver. Michael Parkinson. Maggie "Oooh Maggie darling" Smith. And someone called Lee Styslinger III, who's nowhere near as good as Lee Styslinger II or the classic Lee Styslinger, but just has loads more special effects and no story.
2.11pm Andrew Lockhart has snapped out of it: Haas' nickname is "Hasi". Which more or less means bunny. Hmm." I think it's quite nice.
And T Saiyad is mesmerised: "Have you noticed that Fed seems to have vampire teeth as he tosses up the ball?"
Not really, but he is 3-2 up and rushing through this. No breaks yet. Federer is serving like a machine. Unstoppable.
2.16pm Haas shanks a really horrible volley into the net, but charges to the net and puts his forehand away to take the game. They are both serving beautifully. Going to another tie-break at this rate. It's 3-3.
Mr Lemon says: "I'm getting tired of seeing that picture of Federer on the web page. Can't you change it for something more interesting?" No. I'm at Wimbledon doing the tennis. Sellotape something over it if you don't like it.
2.20pm Ros Francis says on famous faces "You forgot friend of the Federers Gavin Rossdale (Mr Gwen Stefani) sitting next to Mrs Federer in the player's box. I am intrigued by their friendship - when did they become friends? How? Are they friends with any other tennis players? I'm not sure I care enough to find out, though."
They met on the website Celebro-Friend, the leading celebrity friend match service. After three months of text-flirting they decided to get their people to call each other and arrange to sit around looking gloomy together in sunglasses in - possibly - Florida
2.25pm Big moment here as Fed gets to 30-30 on the Haas serve at 4-3. But he nets weakly and then Haas aces him to take the game. Good solid stuff from the German. 4-4. Then Federer rushes through another service game to go 5-4 up.
On vampire teeth Ben Watson says: " think it's more 'white man's overbite' as practised by all white men when dancing to someone like Huey Lewis and the News (for example). 'The heat is on... on the street!'." Hip to be square. Buh. Buh. Hip to be square. Buh. Buh. Doesn't get much better than that.
2.27pm By the way the Williams sisters beat The Other Women 6-1, 6-2. And then popped off for a spot of exercise.
2.31pm Huge moment. Feder has a break point! In fact a set point. The first one of the match. Haas fires down a nerveless first serve to the forehand and saves it. Then holds his nerve to take the game after a couple of deuces. 5-5.
2.33pm Federer holds his serve with contemptuous ease to go 6-5.
Meanwhile Andrew Pascoe is spoiling for a fight after his 16th Fosters of the afternoon: "I love how as soon as there's a serious contender for the crown, everyone in UK actually gets behind him (I say as an antipodean outsider)." Yawn. Is that unusual? Is this not how it works?
2.38pm Haas saves another set point on his serve, but eventually it's all too much as an immaculate Federer raises his game at just the right moment to take the second set 7-5. This match is just going one way now.
And Martin Mombauer laments: "Because of a thunderstorm over Munich (where the German broadcaster sits) people in Germany do not get to see any moving images from Wimbledon." What? Ever?
2.45pm Haas is howling and fretting and burbling. "WAS IST LOS KARTOFFELKOPS JA JA HEIN!!!" he screams. Federer holds easily 1-0. And Louis Clark is on fire: "Lots of people seem to have attended various Blur concerts (is it a concert or a gig? I'm 26, I should know) recently. I think therefore you'd do well to include some form of pun of the 'lives in a Haas, a very big Haas in the country' variety. I feel this would be very popular with your readers…"
Yes, it's absolute gold.
2.46pm And with that I'm due a pre-Murray lasagne-scoffing break. Someone back at Guardian Towers is about to take over for a bit. I really hope you have fun together. No, really. It's fine.
2.59pm Haas appears to be losing it a bit as Federer spanks a couple of aces down the middle to bring about a 4-3 lead in the third set. The Swiss looks to be heading for another Wimbledon final here and he has hardly even broken sweat. In fact does he ever sweat? A Sure advertisement must beckon, surely ...
3.11pm Haas struggles at the beginning of the eighth game as he tries to square the set at 4-4. He drops the ball as he bounces it prior to serve and and proceeds to drop three of the next four points to trail 15-40. But with typical German grit he fights back with a searing backhand down the line to bring about deuce and becomes embroiled in a tit-for-tat exchange in which he saves two more break points before finally double-faulting to bring about a fifth break point for Federer. Haas hits a tame backhand approach to hand the game to Federer and leave him with the simple task of serving out for a place in the final.
3.12pm Federer clinches his place in the final with an athletic leap and smash as Haas struggles to return another thunderbolt service from the World No2. On this evidence Federer looks primed to win his 15th record-breaking grand slam title and his sixth at the All England Club. The final score: 7-6, 7-5, 6-3.
3.16pm Federer does appear to have a little perspiration on his brow in the post-match interview, but it could just be a trick of the light. Soon to enter Centre Court will be Andy Murray and Andy Roddick. You can follow this match live in our minute-by-minute report.
3.24pm You can read about Federer's destruction of Haas in our match report right here. And Barney's already tapping away in his minute-by-minute report of Andy Murray v Andy Roddick. So I'll have to sign him off from this blog. I'm sure he enjoyed it as much as he appears to have enjoyed his lunch. Ahem.
