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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Lifestyle
Moya Sarner

Why we should stop wishing we were special – and celebrate being ordinary

G2: How to build a better life - We all want to be special. Let’s celebrate being ordinary
Composite: Guardian Design; Peter Dazeley/Getty Images

Many of us suffer from a wish to be special. We toil away in the unconscious belief that a special person is a better person, and a special life is a better life. Whether that specialness is conferred by the glamour of celebrity or social media likes, or by the dignified success of reaching the top of your profession, or by the glow of being anointed head girl (no, I wasn’t, and I’m not bitter about it, not at all), this craving to be raised above others, to be “the special one”, can lie at the heart of everything we do.

This wish might be lurking under the making and breaking of your relationships, as you seek the person who will make you feel special, and reject the ones who don’t. It might hide in the extra hours you spend in the office to get something “just right” for your boss, rather than settling for good enough. It might ring out with the alarm that wakes you far too early to train for a marathon, or to perfect a yoga pose.

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