Anna Nordqvist is a player that I’ve always admired. Her gutsy determination and steely Swedish focus has always seen her as one of my favourite players. This season saw her play some amazing golf during the Solheim Cup and in tournaments that followed.
Nobody would have realised what she was battling mentally and emotionally off the golf course. Externally, she looked focused, as she rolled putts from way off the green stone dead and chased after arrow straight drives. Under that steely exterior though, her heart was breaking and her happiness was ebbing.
A divorce bubbling away in the background was one thing, but then news of the death of her ex-husband Kevin McAlpine hit. What a total bombshell to receive in the latter part of October.
Yet with all that turmoil going on in the background she cracked on, produced amazing shots and scores and got the job done. Many people watch these players day in and day out and expect them to play almost like machines, robotically churning scores out and never making mistakes.
In November, Anna decided to play on and compete, but she withdrew from the BMW Ladies Championship in South Korea ahead of the second round following Kevin’s death, finally admitting that she had nothing left.
On 19th November she wrote on Instagram:
“Been trying to put one foot in front of the other for a very long time. As much of a fighter I am - one that never gives up - I am only human and I will be taking an extended break to work on my health and my mental wellbeing the next couple of months. I got absolutely nothing left.”
All the best players in the world have the noise of life bubbling away in the background. We are mostly oblivious to this and expect a polished performance every time they step on the tee. Some are reaching boiling point more than others and hide this so well whilst they smoothly take to the fairways and deliver immaculate rounds of golf.
There are other players who have continued when life has dealt them pretty shoddy cards. Mel Reid waded through the grief of suddenly losing her mother. Jason Day took time out to care for his mother until her death.
Camilo Villegas was second Mexico and then won the following week at the Butterfield Bermuda Championship. This was his first win following the loss of his 22-month old daughter in 2020. He’d battled to focus and felt lost on the course, but found form again this year and mustered an inner force that saw him almost have superhuman powers.
Having been through what Camilo has been through, and being able to relate to that feeling of floating through life without much purpose, I totally acknowledge that these players have the mental power of trojans.
Deflecting the blows that life deals us takes a lot of energy. Emotional energy isn’t within us as an abundant supply. At some point, we will run out and hit a wall. Being aware of this and noticing the triggers is so important.
Perhaps you’re a bit snappier with your temper. Perhaps you aren’t answering WhatsApp messages and have slowly withdrawn yourself from friends. Noticing signs you’re suffering from stress is critical - what you do with this knowledge is even more important.
Realising it’s ok to stop is what will often save us from burnout. Anna realised this and has gone to be nourished and hugged by her family in Sweden. I hope she comes back refreshed and revitalised next season.
Your support network is so important when times are tough, spend time and play golf with energy givers. Not vampires or people who constantly complain. This will drag you further down and these people are often absorbed in what they’re doing or thinking that they are unlikely to notice your dip in mood and lack of happy energy.
It’s easy to sit at home and judge a missed putt, a refusal to sign autographs or a reaction to a shot. These players are humans just like us, they don’t have an autopilot button and they will have days when they’re low and they will make mistakes. I wonder how many players push themselves to the edge, almost to breaking point before finally taking time out.
I really want amateurs to focus on that acknowledgement. If you have stress in your life outside of golf. If you’re experiencing loss, trouble at work or home or family illness. Worry and stress will affect your golf.
You cannot expect to focus and perform your best when there’s all sorts going on in the background, so be kind to yourself and let the odd bad shot go. There’s more to life than making birdies, but wow does it feel good when you do. There’s a reason we play this game and it’s not necessarily to be the best in the world but more to enjoy it and for it to enhance our lives.
Equally it is OK to take time out to re-set. If you’re struggling with your golf and finding it hard to use it as a distraction, therefore not playing well or enjoying it, then STOP. Consciously decide to take a few weeks off. Learn something new, read some books, go for long headspace rich walks. It is ok not to play every single week and we all need a break.
I often found I burnt out after summers of exams plus a heavy amateur golf competition schedule. I’d often go off with a friend for 3 weeks on holiday in my teenage years and I’d always come back and play cracking golf in September. A break is often good for us.
We are all only human. We breathe and we fall down. Let’s not forget this and let’s all be kind to ourselves and take time out to recharge this holiday season.
