Joe Wicks knows what it's like to be a child with parents who are unwell.
The nation's PE teacher, who became a national hero during the first lockdown with his hugely successful YouTube workouts, has been opening up about the struggles of his mum and dad.
Joe, 36, was just a child when his mum Raquel struggled with OCD and eating disorders, while dad Gary battled a heroin addiction and depression.
As part of a new BBC documentary, Joe Wicks: Facing My Childhood, the fitness coach wants to understand how his family’s illnesses affected him as a child.
He also wants to find out how we can better support kids and families living in similar situations today - with 3.7 million children living with a parent who had a moderate or severe mental health condition before the pandemic.
Joe, who grew up with elder brother Nikki, speaks about how roofer dad Gary was often absent or punching the walls of their council flat in Epsom, Surrey.
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Speaking about his dad in an interview with Femail, Joe said: "Dad was in and out of the home because he was battling with addiction, often in rehab.
"He had been a heroin addict from a very young age and I was exposed to the damage of that on a daily basis. Some of my friends had wonderful home lives, but they ended up doing drugs and going down that route."
"I never wanted to be like that. My dad’s example put me off drugs for life."
Gary, who in his 60s, is now clean and has a great relationship with Joe - with the Body Coach frequently posting snaps of the pair together on social media.
Joe added: "He had been an addict for the majority of his life, but he is clean now, which is important. He’s there to support me and we have a great relationship. So many of his friends didn’t make it through addiction. I am just very grateful that he did."
During a recent interview with New magazine, Joe revealed that his relationship with his parents has improved over the years and they are now closer than ever.
He explained: "My relationship with my mum and dad these days is better than its ever been because I understand where they've come from."
All the data suggests that the number of kids living with a parent with a mental health condition will only increase in the coming years.
Even though, without support, children whose parents have mental illness are more likely to go on to have mental health conditions themselves, there is a chronic lack of help for children in this situation.
To discover more, Joe visits Our Time, the UK’s only charity dedicated to working with children of parents with mental illness.
But as Joe explores the issue, he starts to ask questions about both his own childhood and how his early life experiences have affected him as an adult.
Startlingly honest and emotional conversations with his mum, dad and brother unearth long-suppressed memories, leading Joe to confront how he dealt with his turbulent home life, and how it forged his identity today.
When he was 12, Joe's mum left him, Nikki, and their one-year-old brother behind while she had therapy for five months, but the fitness fanatic has no memory of her long absence.
Tearful Raquela says: "It was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. I needed to do that to be a better parent."
Speaking at a screening of the film, Joe said: “For her to leave a one-year-old with a heroin addict, how hard that must have been... She knew if she didn’t go, her whole world was going to fall apart. She did something really brave.”
He added that as a teenager he didn’t understand his mum’s OCD, and it led to many rows. Joe said: “We had such a confrontational relationship.
“I couldn’t walk through the door without taking my shoes off or have friends round. If I’d known I would have been nicer to her and loved her more.”
Joe has said that although his childhood was "chaotic," his experience has helped shape the husband and father that he has become in recent years.
He admitted he isn't "always perfect," admitting that his "default" is to raise his voice and swear as "that's what [he] grew up with" though it's something he's "constantly working on."
Joe, who's expecting his third child, said: "I think everything my mum taught me, and even my dad's mistakes, have helped me become a better husband and a better dad."
* Joe Wicks: Facing My Childhood airs tonight on BBC One at 9pm
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