Get all your news in one place.
100’s of premium titles.
One app.
Start reading
Newcastle Herald
Newcastle Herald
National

When the dog trains the human

Pooches available for adoption through Dog Rescue Newcastle (Clockwise from top left) - Duke, Soxie, Chloe, Buddy, Ruby, Jazz, Chuck, Jessie.

I recently read an interesting article in Topics regarding canine training methods and realised that my own pooch desperately needs some retraining.

Mine is an unusual situation with my dog, an English Staffordshire terrier called Bella. Rather than me being the trainer in our relationship, I am convinced that she has turned the tables on me over the 12 years that she has been part of our family.

She has now perfected her own training methods that are designed to make me obey her every command. For instance, she seems to have me trained to perform menial tasks on command, and she does this on a regular basis.

Example 1: Open Doors on Command

This command is for opening the back door, if closed, so that she can perform her ablutions, or pursue next door's cat if it is careless enough to enter her territory, or if it is dark, to try and terrorise the possum that lives in our garage roof, if it dares to show its face in the moonlight.

She manages to coerce me into giving her access to these activities by using nothing more than canine wiles and cunning, while at the same time making sure I am as inconvenienced as much as possible.

It happens this way: Step 1: She watches me walk in the back door after work, grab a cup of tea, and sit down in the easy chair to relax.

Step 2: She waits patiently until I have turned on the TV, leaned back in the chair and put my feet up. Only then does she pounce.

Step 3: She sits down in front of me and just stares at me with pleading eyes. If this doesn't work, she then scratches at my leg to get my attention.

Step 4: If this fails, she will go and sit at the door and whine at me. If this also fails, she combines whining with a short bark and scratching at the door.

The result: down goes the cup of tea, down goes the footrest of the easy chair. Then, with feet on the floor and a groan mixed with spurious language as get I get up, I walk to the door and let her out. I watch as she runs down the back steps, pauses at the bottom, and I swear she smiles in triumph as she turns to look at me before tearing down the path while barking at the top of her voice, to the back of the shed to look for a cat or possum to terrorise.

Score one for Bella!

Example 2: The Belly Rub

It happens this way: Step 1: Waiting for the right moment, she gives me the command that will ensure compliance with her wishes (i.e. the belly rub). She does this by waiting until I happen to walk past her, bent on some chore or other, and throws herself down on her back with all four legs in the air, her tail wagging, and an appealing look on her face.

If this fails to get the desired result and I walk past her, she will jump to her feet, run in front of me, and repeat the command. And if this also fails, she will keep repeating the command until I either trip over her and drop the items I have loaded in my arms, or acquiesce to her demands.

Step 2: If by chance I don't obey on these occasions, she will repeat the command whenever it inconveniences me the most, which I am sure, is an act of vengeance for not obeying the first time.

The result: the belly rub command is usually obeyed every time. Score two for Bella!

Example 3: Commanding a Treat

It happens this way: Step 1: Like any canine, treats form an important part of daily life and, in Bella's case, are to be provided on demand. Her commands for satisfying this addiction vary in intensity and style, but generally result in a satisfactory way for her.

The first command comprises no physical display, but rather relies on the sympathy card. This comprises positioning herself in a location that is sure to gain my attention, and usually happens when I'm either sitting in the easy-chair with a meticulously prepared snack and the TV on a favourite program, or I'm in the kitchen preparing said snack.

In either case, she squats on the floor and stares at me with an appealing look in her eyes, licking her lips, and softly whining a "give me some" appeal.

The result: Bella's command is obeyed in quick order and she departs the vicinity until next time.

I have to admit that this command is mostly my fault, as I initially gave her and my other dogs treats as pups during training.

As they grew older, I still gave them treats for good behaviour, and as they reached old age, I continued the practice. These days I resist as much as I can, in an effort to control Bella's weight.

But now she has learned that she can control the distribution of treats, by using her various wiles, and the ultimate weapon of puppy dog eyes.

By far her most blatant command for treats is derived from my own bad behaviour. You see I work from home, and at the end of the day, after sitting in front of a computer all day and dealing with the never-ending emails and such, I like to relax with a couple of tipples of my favourite alcoholic (insert "medicinal") beverage. At six o'clock every evening, I grab my favourite glass, clink a couple of ice cubes into it, grab my preferred beverage, and settle down to relax.

Somehow Bella knows all about this ritual, and waits in the shadows until she hears the fridge open, and the ice hit the bottom of the glass, and when I close the fridge door and turn around, there she is. This results in a win for Bella, of course.

She has been doing this for a number of years, and even passed the method on to the other dogs that we had at the time. Mind you, she was not selfish with this command, and if the other dogs were asleep at the time she would go find them and wake them up so they would not miss out.

Result: Bella wins every time!

Sign up to read this article
Read news from 100’s of titles, curated specifically for you.
Already a member? Sign in here
Related Stories
Top stories on inkl right now
One subscription that gives you access to news from hundreds of sites
Already a member? Sign in here
Our Picks
Fourteen days free
Download the app
One app. One membership.
100+ trusted global sources.