When the Bridezilla label was thrown my way, I realised no one was safe from this sexist trope

‘There’s a special kind of contempt reserved for brides (and it is always the bride) who have a good idea about the kind of wedding she would like to have.’ Photograph: Peter Dazeley/Getty Images

In marriage, there is a contradiction between what society values (love, commitment) and what it diminishes (weddings). While vowing to spend your life with someone is considered serious enough to involve the state, the wedding where it happens can seem frivolous and impractical.

Maybe this is why many reserve a special kind of contempt for brides (and it is always the bride) who have a good idea about the kind of wedding they would like to have. She even has a nickname: the bridezilla.