Campmates on I’m a Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here took a break from dodging spiders and snakes last night to have a frank discussion about sexuality, as is the case on most group holidays after three days (and a few bottles of wine).
This prompted a revelation from Tulisa Contostavlos, of N-Dubz fame — she disclosed that she felt “demisexual” in her approach to dating.
Tulisa also revealed that she has been celibate for over three years due to her sexual preferences.
As the group discussed dating apps, Tulisa explained how she has largely avoided online dating save for a brief attempt at using Raya, the private members’ app aimed at celebrities, creatives and high-profile personalities.
“Even though I’ve been on there, I’ve never gone on an actual date with anyone on there,” she said. “I’m proper guarded.”
She added: “I feel like I’m demisexual, I need to have a really close emotional bond with someone [...] I need actual depth. I’m a slow, slow burner. I’ve been celibate for over three years.”
So what is demisexuality? Being demisexual is less of a sexuality in the gendered sense of who you are attracted to, though it may be confused with bisexuality due to its name.
Demisexuality is actually on the same spectrum of asexuality. It means to not be sexually attracted to another person unless a strong emotional connection has been formed.
5 other sexualities and their meanings:
Sapiosexual: finding intelligence sexually or romantically attractive or arousing. Being sexually attracted to people who are very intelligent.
Autosexual: primarily experiencing sexual attraction to oneself, and little to no sexual attraction to others.
Allosexual: a person who feels a sexual attraction to anyone, regardless of sexual orientation (i.e the lesser-known term for ‘pansexual’).
Graysexual: people who experience limited sexual attraction.
Libidoist asexual: an asexual person who experiences sexual feelings that are satisfied through self-stimulation or masturbation but does not engage in sex with others.
Tulisa is not the first celebrity to “come out” as demisexual. In 2020, Pop author and artist Alex Kazemi spoke about being demisexual in an interview with King Kong Garçon. “I’m a demisexual demigod. Demisexuality is the future. The idea of demisexuality is only having sex with people that you feel emotions, love or energy for. It’s so much about the souls connecting.”
Nor is she the first celebrity to identify with a lesser-known sexuality. In 2019, Mark Ronson revealed that he considered himself to be “sapiosexual” — when a person is sexually attracted to highly intelligent people, though following a negative reaction he retracted the comments.
“I do not consider myself part of any marginalised community, and I apologise if anybody misunderstood or took offense to it,” Ronson told Rolling Stone.
