LOFTY DELIGHTS
Kensington Roof Gardens is rebornA new dawn is rising across west London as the iconic 1930s, Alhambra-inspired Kensington Roof Gardens finally blooms again after six years fallow. Having been handed between billionaires — Virgin’s Sir Richard Branson and OVO founder Stephen Fitzpatrick — the resting giant atop the former Biba department store will be coming back strong as a members’ club for a new generation. Will the resident flamingos be back? Only time will tell. Kensington Roof Gardens is due to open soon.
MOVE OVER SHORT KINGS
It’s Daddy Long Legs SummerNow that Jeremy Allen White has fully resolved short man syndrome for all mankind, may we move on from the short kings and on to the daddy longlegs? 6ft 5in Lee Pace is all over the internet boyfriend thirst sites, Jeff Goldblum (6ft 4½) is our heritage love and always in style. Plus we’ve come to know and love 6ft 5 Travis Kelce now he’s Taylor’s version. Go on, give big dogs, not just hot rats, a chance.
PARTY LIKE A CONMAN
Glastonbury’s break-out tongue in cheek dance act Confidence Man give us their top tips for partying like it’s 2024
GET NAKEDThe less clothes the better we say.
KITCHEN RAVESometimes the kitchen is all you need — if you can’t handle the heat, get out.
BODIES OF WATERThese will be essential for your summer party setting.
SPRITZAperol, Montenegro, whatever you fancy, just add some bubbles and a bit of rind and you’re all set.
BOAT RAVEThe vessel can be any size, even a canoe will do.
JOIN THE BRATZCharli XCX and co are the glam trash antidote to social media’s anodynation of all culture. Beige tones and perfect make-up be gone, these gals are the smudged-up morning-after equivalent of Paul Mescal’s slutty shorts movement. Yes, the Brat neon green Pantone suits no one except Slimer or a Waitrose tote bag, but it’s the shade of the summer, so don’t @ us. Because who wouldn’t want to be part of their gang?
PUT YOUR FOOT IN IT
Lily Allen is dipping her toes in the water of explicit site Only Fans after her pedicurist pointed out her dainty feet could earn big money. Setting up ‘Lily Allen FTSE500’, she’s promising sexy foot pics at a price. ‘My feet are rated quite highly on the internet’, she laughed on her podcast Miss Me? Time to paint those nails and dust off that sexy toe ring to do the same?
HAIR WARS: CUT OUT AND TAKE TO THE BARBERS NOW
The Gladiator MulletAre you not entertained that all men are suddenly running to the hairdresser with a picture of the ruffled top and back by Paul Mescal’s Lucius? And outside of the Ton, Luke Newton’s shark-fin is doing the rounds on every Gen Z boi from London Fields to Peckham.
Princess Di-LightsLil Nas X and Troye Sivan have us all reaching for the bleach, because this summer wash out needs brighteningup. Whether it’s painted-on platinum or stripey highlights à la Lady Di herself, the key is the blonder the better. Exercise with caution, or your hair will pay the price.
’Buzzin for itIf you haven’t seen Joseph Quinn’s beautifully buzzed head doing the promo trail for A Quiet Place: Day One, then were have you been? It’s simple, it’s chic, it’s a little nod to the Noughties and you can do it at home in about five minutes flat.
NEW ROAD TINS
Off to a wedding, festival or just work? These tinny tipples won’t raise an eyebrow, say the ES team
BONE IDYLL Pink Gin CosmoNicole says: ‘Like Carrie in SATC, I’d like a cheeseburger, large fries and a Cosmopolitan. Specifically this one.’
WHITEBOX Pocket NegroniJo says: ‘Especially excellent if you keep these in the freezer. Plus a bargain at £5 a tin.’
MIXTONS Dragon MojoMax says: ‘Delicious! Refreshing! Does your Mojito have dragonfruit in it? Didn’t think so!’
MOTH MargaritaJess says: ‘Not quite the same as drinking it on the Gulf of Mexico, but good enough for the pavement at Old Street roundabout.’
DRINKS BUREAU Espresso MartiniEmily says: ‘That’s that me Espresso (Martini). And no I can’t sleep, baby, I know.’
THE LESBIAN RENAISSANCE
Haven’t you heard? The Lesbian Renaissance is here, queer and packing out pubs, galleries, venues and even entire streets all across the capital, says The Standard’s El Hunt.
At the inaugural Dyke Market in Kennington last week, almost 2,000 dykes and their associates patiently queued around the block to get their fill of Sapphic merch. In June, the long-absent Dyke March — a trans-inclusive, grassroots alternative to Pride — returned after a decade away, with roughly 5,000 people taking part, including the iconic Amy Spalding from BBC’s dating reality showI Kissed A Girl. Though the dykes have always been everywhere, with nights like Butch Please, Wet, Gal Pals and Pxssy Palace paving the way long before 2024, there have truly never been more lesbian nights and spots to pick from: Carabiner, Strapped, Pop-Up Dyke Bar, La Camionera and parody pop-up diner Booters (think: Hooters, but more butch) are just a handful of the newest additions to the circuit. Plus, a new queen has been anointed with Julia Fox joining our ranks with a simple, ‘Sorry boys’.
MEET KADIFF KIRWAN, SUMMER’S HOT WING KING
The Slow Horses actor on The National’s spicy new play
‘I’d never read anything like the script for The Hot Wing King in my life: about a chosen family of these four queer Black men and it not be about them being queer, or their trauma. Playing the central character of Cordell, on the page I was like, “Bro, you are not nice.” You start digging through the layers and why this chicken wing competition is so important to him and why he’s whipping all of his friends into a frenzy about it. I’m cooking in real time. We’ve had a lot of meetings about chicken. I don’t want to give the whole cast salmonella!Every single audience member will be able to see what I’m putting in the pot, what I’m flambéing, what I’m frying. We’ll be serenading your taste buds and your nostrils as we go, so either come with a full belly, or book a chicken restaurant for after. Slow Horses is currently in production as well as being in tech rehearsals for the play. Of course it’s knackering, but I would have it no other way. Slow Horses has been the job of my life. It’s an ensemble piece, that’s what you see on screen but that’s what there is off the screen — we’re like a weird motley crew family who are all obsessed with each other. Gary [Oldman] is just 20/10 — what a colleague, what a guy. I was out at a thing recently and bloody Gary Lineker came up to me and said he loved it and I was like, “Sorry what?!”Marcus [my character] gets himself into some situations this series, and I’ve still got the scars to prove it — we did so many stunts, each episode is like an action film, but emotional too. It’s epic, it’s riveting and I’m buzzed for everyone to see it. I’m working all summer, but this is worth not being on a beach for.’‘The Hot Wing King’ is at the National Theatre until 14 September (nationaltheatre.org.uk). ‘Slow Horses’ season 4 is on Apple TV+ from 4 September
TRAD MEN GET WOODEurope might be on a roll for giving the Right wing a firm no, but somehow, social media is still pounding us with suggested trad content — all feeding this Project 2025 narrative that puritanism is coming. But this time, it’s not just barefoot women in large kitchens with seven children by their dirndl skirts. Now it’s beefy men in Carhartt overalls, whipping off their leather belts to harness a tree stump before chopping (and grunting) for their lives. It’s irreproachably watchable, as are the algorithm’s persistent recommendations that we watch a hot topless guy putting horseshoes on and also the modelly man lassoing and demonstrating knots. The trouble is, we are simply too seated.
Girls who dress up who date boys who dress downIf the rest of these items haven’t already suggested that men (grr!) are back, then well, here’s another nail in Harry Styles’ pussy bow blouse’s coffin (it’s fine, he’s already abandoned ship in favour of a finance bro, blue button-down anyway). But when Dua Lipa and Callum Turner made their Glastonbury hard debut, we couldn’t notice that his pared-back look was a stark contrast to her full-fashion leather wrap and matching slouch booties. Those straight-leg jeans, plain grey tee and basic grey trainers were direct from the early Noughties Jamie Dornan-Keira Knightley dating playbook, where girls dressed up (preferably in a going-out top and something extremely low slung) and boys just wore clothes. That idiosyncratic era lasted 10 minutes at least.
I scream, you scream, we all scream for boozy ice creamWhat could be better than a delicious dessert accompanied by a devilish digestivo? All in one neat little mouthful, of course. And it seems we’re not the only ones to think so. Nigella has recently debuted her own Sgroppino recipe on Instagram, while The Dover’s newly launched Affogato Martini, starring vodka, Amaro Borsci, espresso and vanilla ice cream, is designed to hoist Mayfair’s most indulgent clientele to flavourtown. Meanwhile, the ice cream fairy, Terri Mercieca of Happy Endings, has created not one but two soft serve cocktails for Stereo in Covent Garden: The Sassy One, starring Select Aperitivo, passion fruit liqueur, white wine and vanilla bitters, as well as the Elderflower 77, featuring gin, St Germain liqueur, elderflower, lime and cucumber. Pretty cool, no?
UN-RIVALLED READING: GET YOUR KICKS WITH JILLY’S BEST PAGE FLICKSThe summer stretches achingly ahead of us, throbbing with potential and wet (mainly projected rainfall). There’s never been a better time to have a sexy book in hand, and with Jilly Cooper’s Rivals riding on to screens in autumn, why not slut up your reading list with the doyenne herself. Add all 11 of those Rutshire Chronicles books to your Kindle, but we especially love The Man Who Made Husbands Jealous (as if hot tennis guys needed any more positive PR right now) and Tackle! (all set around football, football, football: topical, post-Euros). Then if you’ve got more gas in the tank, dip into Jilly’s 1970s series of girls gone wild with names like Imogen, Prudence, Octavia and our personal favourite, Emily.
