We Simply *Had* To Investigate Why Conservative Pollies Are Always So Red In The Face

When I was watching the election night coverage, keeping tabs on the many Liberal politicians losing their seats, there was something that stood out to me. A red glow emanated from my laptop screen. No, t’was not just the wave of seats going to Labor. Rather, it was the faces of conservative politicians getting increasingly flushed. It made me wonder: why are conservative politicians always so red? Now, I say this as a redhead who blushes easily and has pretty frequent acne flare-ups. My cheeks are very often rosy, a vibe I greatly enjoy. But this redness I noticed from conservative politicians was something else. It was a redness from within, glowing outwards through their skin like a tiny collapsing sun living inside their faces. I knew I had to investigate. I knew I had to search for the truth.

Case #1

I first noticed this in MP Tim Wilson